


Deep Blue

by pricemactavish



Category: Call of Duty
Genre: -ly hot, Angst, Awkward accident prone Logan, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Keegan's voice is ridiculous, M/M, Sex, Walker Family Feelings, basically this is really really fluffy
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-01-10
Updated: 2017-09-16
Packaged: 2018-01-08 05:24:35
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 38,278
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1128844
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/pricemactavish/pseuds/pricemactavish
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Being a Ghost meant that things we're never going to be normal for Logan Walker, it didn't help that he was an accident-prone, clumsy, awkward guy, and maybe a little in love with a very mysterious scout sniper. Set pre-Into The Deep.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

Logan, his whole life, has never been a big fan of the ocean. Beaches sure, the sand was nice, dry and solid. But the open water..no, definitely not a fan. Today was no exception. Doing an infiltrating deep sea mission with a high risk of failure? Even less okay with that. On top of it all, it was bit weird going on mission without his older brother, Hesh. He was so accustomed to having his brother at his back or side, covering him, covering each other.

But as he stared over at Keegan, who was checking his under-water rifle, he felt that familiar stir in his stomach and uneven rhythm in his heart. He instantly dropped his eyes and suddenly became very interested in his hands. These feelings turned the usually grounded, level-headed young solider into a stuttering, nervous mess. He wasn't used to feeling like this. Ever since he met the man in the woods and his icy gaze fell over him, it's been this way.

It was obvious, he liked the older Sergeant, more than he should. And certainly more than his dad or brother would approve of, he's sure. Keegan was usually quite the loner. Yet, from the get go, the scout sniper seemed to drift towards Logan.  
In battle, he was always directly in view of him or when they needed to move up he'd be crouched in the back waiting for Logan to catch up. Logan was a bit clumsy sometimes or maybe a touch accident-prone, but still a damn talented soldier. Regardless, Keegan was always there first to lend him a hand in a firm grasp to help him up.

Then, when they weren't fighting and back at the base, he'd still find his way to him. If Logan was lounging on the couch after a particularly brutal mission, Keegan would be in the chair next to him reading silently. He's fallen asleep on the same couch many times before and woken up covered by a blanket that he's pretty damn sure wasn't there before and Keegan was still sitting in the same chair.

Logan wasn't sure what to make of the man's actions. He frustrated the youngest member of the Ghosts frequently with his mysterious nature, yet it only seemed to rope him in deeper. Keegan even seemed to speak to Logan the most..in a non-mission critical sort of way. Which he hadn't even seen him do much with Merrick..whom he'd known for years. They could sit comfortably in silence together just listening to the other breathing or the let out the occasional sigh. Other times they could speak about anything and everything really even if it was Logan doing most of the talking. Keegan still looked interested and entirely focused on what Logan had to say. The two of them were by far the most introverted of the Ghosts, so maybe that's why they winded up together so often. It was still new territory for Logan to, for once, not want to follow his older brother around all the time. And this whole stupid crush thing or whatever you wanted to call it, was even more of a new thing for him.

The nerves crept up on him again, he moved about in his seat and dared to lift his eyes back to stare at the dark haired man across from him. Keegan being with him, as much as it made him nervous, gave him strength and made him a little less afraid of a lifelong fear. Keegan seemed to notice the younger Sergeant's unease and stared at him intently with a raised brow which wasn't helping Logan's already racing heart.

"You ok, kid?" Keegan's rough voice was unusually soft.

"Honestly?" Logan hesitated, not really sure if Keegan would laugh at him for his childish fear of the ocean. Logan sighed quietly to himself and looked up at Keegan who gave him a small smile and nod to urge him on. "Well to be honest...no. You can't laugh ok because Hesh already has plenty of times. But I kind of hate the ocean..it scares me alright."

Keegan had a confused expression on his face and he sat back as if to get a better view of Logan but still, as he silently promised, didn't laugh. "That seems a bit odd considering the fact that you've lived by the ocean your whole life."

"Yeah..tell me about it.." Logan said sarcastically.

"Well, is there any specific reason it scares you, kid?"

"I don't know, Keegan. It's hard to explain. The ocean is so huge and unknown. It's a little fucking scary. I swear if a megalodon eats me today I'm gonna be so pissed. Hell, Hesh would be even more pissed at me, I'm sure, and not the shark." Logan rambled on, mostly because of the stress that never seemed to have left him. But then a soft sound reached his ears causing them to perk up, something he hadn't heard before. It was a deep low chuckle that came from Keegan's mouth. Logan was a bit taken aback from the sweet noise and stared on at the other man not sure how to respond. Keegan leaned forward and placed his hand on Logan's wet suit covered knee and squeezed it, Logan suddenly felt a lot more than nervous about the ocean.

"Look kid..Logan, you're not going down there alone. I'll be right by your side the whole time, I promise. I sure as hell won't let a fucking giant extinct shark get you. Though I'm sure you'd put up quite the fight against one, I'd bet on you." Keegan's voice was reassuring and gentle but edged with a slightly humorous tone. His hand still remained on Logan's knee, when the younger man realized this, he felt his cheeks heat up. Thank god for the black paint that covered some of his face. Although, it seemed that the other man did notice and appeared to smirk slightly before removing his hand.

Then, as Keegan leaned back into his seat, he reached for his signature skull mask and pulled it over his face. Logan fought back the nearly audible whine of disapproval for the action and tried to ignore the subtle ache in his chest for not being able to see Keegan's face fully. But he did see the sniper's eyes, the striking light blue that sent electric volts to his heart. He swallowed and pushed the thoughts from his mind, trying to re-focus on the mission without lingering too long on the underwater part.

"You can do this Logan, I know you can. We can do this." Keegan sounded so confident, so sure. "We'll be fine, you'll see. After this we'll go someplace dry, preferably with delicious food." Even though Keegan's face was covered, Logan could sense the smile that was surely on his face.

"Ok then, it's a date." Logan sputtered out before he could think. "I mean, cool...that sounds great." He coughed awkwardly hoping that what he said didn't sink in too deep with Keegan.

"Yeah, thought it sounded like a nice date too." Keegan shrugged and crossed his arms.

Logan nearly choked on air.  
__________________________________  
So far, the mission had been successful, `apart from one close call with a shark. Keegan was right, they definitely weren't the only hunters out here. Fucking sharks.  
Keegan and Logan were an excellent team, and they'd taken out all the hostiles with little problems.  
Soon enough, they reached the old broken down lighthouse near the ship and swam inside it to the top.

"We need to take out that sub. I'll line it up, you guide it in." Logan's focus faltered for a second at the older Ghosts' wording. Damn his dirty mind. Logan quickly snapped his attention back to the task at hand and led the torpedo perfectly to the weak point of the ship and they both watched as it blew up.

"Alright good shot, that was easier than I thought. Let's get the hell out of-" Keegan was cut off by the blast of the sub's explosion. "Logan, come on! Move! Move!" They both could see the lighthouse was coming down. Keegan tried to grab onto Logan and help him but the two were quickly separated from the impact. Before Logan could try to swim away he was struck by a large piece of the lighthouse's brick.

"Kid! Logan! Logan!" Logan could barley make out the sound of Keegan's panicked voice as his body hit the bottom of the ocean floor. He felt as though he lungs would burst, his vision started to flicker to black. He struggled to remain conscious, trying to stay calm and get the heavy metal off his arm.

All at once Logan felt a huge amount of pressure being taken off his chest and his breathing tube was re-attached.  
"Logan, talk to me dammit, are you ok?" softer then, "stay with me, I need you to be ok.."

"K..Keegan." Logan took a huge breath and tried to steady his focus on the sound of Keegan's voice.

"You okay?" Keegan put up the 'ok' sign with his fingers and Logan responded with a nod.

"Logan..thank god. Let's get the rest of this shit off of you." Logan helped Keegan as much as he could to pull of the rest the wall. Before he could fully recover, he was being pulled into Keegan's arms.

"Jesus kid, I thought..I thought you were dead. You can't do that to me." Then, still in shock from being in the man's arms he leaned forward pressing his forehead into Keegan's, still breathing deeply.

"Sorry...I'll have to watch out for falling lighthouse in the future." Logan said a bit of breath, "Can we just get out of this fucking ocean?"

Logan heard that warm sound of Keegan's laughter which seemed to brighten all the previous darkness that had consumed him. Keegan then pressed his forehead closer and said,  
"I like the sound of that."  
__________________________________

Logan was restless, laying on this stupid medical bed and he wasn't even hurt! Not all that bad at least. Just a couple bruised ribs and maybe less of a fear of oceans and more of a fear of lighthouses. But the young sergeant has definitely had worse injuries. The only thing that was really on his mind was one thing..where was Keegan? Logan was going stir crazy since he hadn't seen his friend in hours.

The nurses insisted repeatedly that he get some sleep but how could he when his mind was all consumed with Keegan. Now that the mission was out of the way it seemed to be the only thing that his mind was willing to think of.

He didn't understand why the man had reacted the way he did when he got hurt and what was up with the date thing from earlier that day?  
Was it possible? No..no it couldn't be..but what if it was that he felt the same for Logan as Logan felt for him. Did he fall for him too? It didn't seem possible that the gorgeous, quiet man with the best sniper skills he'd ever seen would want to be with someone like him. Just some kid from San Diego. Logan began to piece together everything that had happened between them since they'd met to try and make sense of it all.. But damn, Keegan was so fucking mysterious. He was hard man to read and all of this was just giving him a headache.

A door opening quietly interrupted his thoughts and he saw that face, unmasked, the one that sent his head spinning and immediately his body responded by sitting up slightly. His face scrunched up in pain at the motion.

"Hey kid...are you up?" Keegan's deep voice whispered cutting through the silence. It was pretty dark in the room and probably hard to see.

"Keegan, hey. Yeah I'm up. How did you get past the medics? They seemed to be hell bent on me getting some sleep.." Keegan laughed, third time that day. It was a sweet sound, one Logan would love to hear again and again, especially if he was the one who caused it.

"Well it sure as hell wasn't easy. I tried to sneak past those nurses ten damn times but..man do they watch you like a hawk." Keegan crossed the room and gestured to the chair beside Logan's bed. "Mind if I..?"

"No, no of course not. Go ahead." Logan tried to reel in his happiness at finally being in the man's presence again, "You tried to sneak past the nurses? Really Keegan?" It was Logan's turn to laugh and he saw that soft smile from earlier creep on the edges of Keegan's mouth. Logan's eyes drifted to the other man's lips, fuck..he had such a nice smile. The urge to move closer to the dark haired man was almost impossible to fight. Keegan's glacier blue eyes flickered up to meet Logan's dark brown one's.

"Yeah it was a pretty poor display on my part. Especially since I'm supposed to be a 'stealth expert'." Keegan moved closer to Logan as well, he could feel his breath hitting his face and Logan noticed Keegan's eyes move lower to his lips, a look in the older man's eyes he'd never seen before.

"I don't know, you must have been pretty damn good since you bested them." Logan's voice became rougher feeling the intense desire to kiss the man before him.

"You give me too much credit..I had to play dirty in the end. Nearly ended up going prone." His voice was husky and it sent a shivers down the young Sergeant's spine.

"Hah, now that's something I'd like to see." Logan smirked, another small laugh escaping his lips as he imagined the older man crawling past nurses just to see him laying all pathetically in bed.

"Nah you should be glad you didn't, I tell ya kid it was awful." Keegan let his hand ruffle through the younger soldiers tousled blonde hair..the action seemed to linger a bit longer than he may have intended before he removed it. Instantly Logan missed the sensation. Keegan seemed to eye Logan all over, assessing his injuries. "So, what's the damage? They wouldn't tell me shit."

Logan shifted a bit uncomfortably in the bed, "Nothing too bad, just a couple bruised ribs and they think my wrist might be a bit sprained. Plus they had to stitch it up. Nothing to keep me out of action or anything though." Keegan seemed to squint at this, scrutinizing him further now, Logan felt a little self-conscious under his stare. Keegan's hand moved from his lap to the bed now, and it drifted to Logan's bandaged arm, his fingers gently ran across the cloth, his expression unreadable.

"I know you can take care of yourself..but I still wish there was something I could have done." His fingers still grazed the bandage and Logan hadn't realized that he wasn't breathing until he needed a huge breath to fill him up. This seemed to snap Keegan out of his daze as he quickly removed his caressing fingers. If Logan would have known that would have been the result, he would have gladly blacked out from lack of oxygen.

A silence feel between them now, not awkward..but full of too many unspoken things. Keegan leaned far over Logan's bed, resting his elbows on the mattress. Both staring at each other, not daring to break the contact, but not brave enough to move any closer. The thoughts that damn near driven Logan crazy just a little bit ago had returned in full force and he couldn't help what came out of his mouth next.

"Keegan...I...what was that about..down there in the water? The hug. And..the date thing from before?" Logan was unable to hold it back anymore. It had been far too long..far too many nights tossing and turning trying to understand what was between them. Friendship? Brother-hood? Love? He didn't want anymore questions or mysteries. He wanted the truth..no matter if it was what he wanted to hear or not. Logan knew that if he didn't ask Keegan, the quiet, keeping-to-himself man point blank..he might never know and that thought killed him more than anything. The uncertainty.

The look on Keegan's face was unreadable but he instantly seemed uncomfortable, and moved his face, that was dangerously close to Logan's, away. "Kid..can we not do this, please. I..I'm not good at this kind of stuff. I'm really just the worst kind of awkward." Keegan stuttered, he seemed hesitant as he rubbed the back of his neck anxiously but then Logan gave him the same reassuring smile that he'd given to Logan earlier and it seemed to be just the push the man needed. He leaned forward towards Logan, not as close as before but still close enough to feel his heart beat quicken. He reached over and grabbed Logan's good hand, Logan felt his fingers twine with his and a crushing relief wash over him, he squeezed back.

"Just tell me, Keegan." Logan whispered sitting up, almost on the edge of desperation at this point. He heard Keegan clear his throat and breathe shakily. Logan found his breathing mirroring his. He knew that this was the point of no return. Keegan's eyes closed for a moment or two, he seemed deep in thought. Eyebrows pulled together in concentration before he opened his mouth.

"Look, I'll say it plainly. I'm pretty damn crazy for you, kid. From the moment I met you in those woods. You knocked me off my feet, kid. I've never wanted to get close to anyone..I've been there before and it always ends badly..but with you.. With you it felt as easy and natural as breathing. Shit..crazy for you isn't enough. I..I love you, Logan. You and your constantly messy blonde hair and the way you tell stories about your family with the most exhilarating smile that lights up your whole face, the way you always fall asleep on the couch after missions and talk in your sleep. The way you..the way you make me feel, I've never felt like this before. No one ever makes me laugh but you..it's just everything about you, Logan."

Logan felt his heart seize in his chest. So this was it. He did feel the same..fuck. And he knew about the sleep talking. Also, fuck. Keegan didn't look up at Logan until he said the words again.

"I love you, Logan. You don't have to feel like you need to say it back or if you don't feel the same..then I'm sorry about all this. I could just go? I could..I probably should-" Keegan made a move to get up, beginning too unwrap his fingers from Logan's. The younger man panicked and grabbed Keegan's forearm to stop him from leaving with such force that the older man fell back in his chair. Logan ignored the slight pain in his ribs as he leaned over fully to Keegan, placing his other hand that wasn't being held, on Keegan's face. His fingers grazing over the sharp jaw and stubble that covered it. Keegan's eyes seemed to flutter a bit, leaning into the touch.

"Keegan..I've loved you from the moment you said 'Watch and learn, kid.' From all the times you stayed back and fought by my side, all those times you'd read in your chair and tell me the best parts, and when I'd fall asleep I'd be covered up and you'd still be watching over me. How could you ever think I wouldn't feel the same? Of course I do, Keegan..you have no idea how long I've wanted to be with you."

Keegan had a look of disbelief on his face and shook his head slowly before a smile of sheer happiness broke out on it, one that Logan couldn't believe belonged to the same man he'd fallen for. Then, Keegan closed the gap between their faces and crushed their lips together. /Finally/, was all that Logan could think. Little did he know, Keegan was thinking the same. The kiss was full of many things, months of pent up longing, pining, love, it was hard and rough..and yet the softest thing either had ever felt. Their mouths moved together in perfect sync, noses bumping together as the hand that was on Keegan's face slid down to his neck. The kiss lasted a few more seconds before Keegan pulled away, breathing hard, once again resting his forehead on Logan's, his own hand coming up to stroke the younger's face.

"So, I guess we're still on for that date then?" Keegan let out a soft groan when Logan moved his forehead away from his and kissed at his neck. Logan nodded against him fervently.

"Oh yeah, definitely." Logan replied breathlessly. Keegan smiled again and let out that laugh that laugh that was now surely Logan's favorite sound.

"Glad to hear it. But uh..you probably should get some rest though, Logan." Keegan said biting his lip, looking like he was ready to go in for another kiss.

"Mmm..probably..but I think I'd like to kiss you some more first." With that their lips connected again and they both let out a nearly simultaneous moan of pleasure. They continued this for several more minuets getting lost in the feeling before Logan pulled away this time and beyond his control, yawned.

"Okay..so maybe sleep would be a good idea...if you stayed here with me, that is?" Logan questioned innocently, but it was deceitful thanks to mischievous smile on his face.

"Ah..of course, where else would I go? But really we should actually sleep, pretty sure we have to be up in less than 4 hours, as much as I do enjoy the kissing." He let his eyes drop down to Logan's kissed bruised lips longing to taste them again, but resisting. Well almost, he let himself give Logan one more kiss, lingering for a moment or two before he stood from his chair, and managed to squeeze himself onto the bed next to Logan, who instantly curled himself on Keegan's chest.

"You wait til morning, then I'll make you sick of kissing." Logan mumbled drowsily.

"Hah, I doubt you'll have much luck with that, kid." Keegan wrapped his arms around Logan completely, carefully avoiding his injured ribs and wrist then said, "night, Logan."

"Night Keegan, I love you." The laugh again from Keegan, only this time softer, sweeter, almost in awe and he felt lips brushing against his messy blonde locks.

"Love you too, Logan."

Okay..maybe that was Logan's favorite sound.


	2. Soldier On

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It started with a feeling, two soldiers meeting in a forest during unfortunate circumstances, it grew from there, an instant connection that was impossible to deny and painful to ignore. Despite everything between Keegan and Logan being so new and exciting, the Federation and Rorke leave them under a cloud of a looming threat, a new feeling edging on the surface.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Finally, an update! And whew, this was a beast to write, but I was determined to get it out for you guys. A lot of you were asking for an update and all that so...here it is!  
> I have to say the album 'Bad Blood' by 'Bastille' and the song 'Soldier On' by The Temper Trap inspired this part majorly.
> 
> I'm planning to write a third and final part to this someday, but don't expect it for quite a while as I am primarily focused on my Soap/Price fic.
> 
> Hope you guys enjoy! :3

Training with his dad taught Logan countless things. One of the most important lessons Elias instilled in Hesh and him was to always be on your guard, know your surroundings, adapt, and be alert. Thanks to that knowledge impressed on him, Logan had a set of noises he associated as 'normal'; dad running on a treadmill, a microwave beeping from someone reheating coffee, Riley pattering around on the wood floors, Hesh mumbling to himself while he jotted down in his notebook, Keegan's quiet breathing and turning pages of a book, the clicking of Merrick checking his guns, Kick typing on a keyboard. Anything that didn't fit into that category was a sign that something wasn't right, that he needed to wake up and be prepared for anything.

A distant beeping and sharp intake of breath didn't fit the mold, Logan twitched from his sleep on the bed, the unusually warm and moving bed. He attempted to stretch his arms out above his head, but found he was unable, held in a tight grip that seemed to be unrelenting. At first, he was horrified at the realization that someone was in his bed, but all in the same second he remembered that he wasn't actually in his own bed, but a hospital issued crappy foam mattress. To be exact, he wasn't laying on a bed..but a body. Keegan's well toned, firm body. He could make out the soft breathing and the comforting rise and fall of his chest. It all made him ease back into a lazy state, though his mind felt anything but. Logan never pictured revealing his feelings for Keegan in a hospital bed, and he most certainly didn't think the first time he'd sleep with him would be in the same exact bed, though it didn't have the same meaning he wanted. His skin flushed at the thought, he did promise to make Keegan sick of kissing in the morning.

He peeked his eyes open slowly, the room was barely lit and dim, but behind the closed curtains he could see the sun had risen, his breathing stilled as he gazed up and was met with the view of Keegan's chin and mouth, his closed lips pouted and full. There were still traces of dark face-makeup on him from the mission, though faded and grayed after a night's rest, rather, a few hours of sleep in the early morning hours. Even in his sleep Keegan looked guarded and armored, his protective grasp around the Logan's body proved this further. Logan lifted a careful hand off of Keegan's chest and touched the stubble on his jaw, Logan's fingers gingerly moved across the angles, the prickled skin was practically inviting him to brush his lips there once, so he does, then maybe once more. A low noise reaches his ears, Keegan grunts and tightens his grasp around Logan, somehow, even in barely woken state, avoided his bruised ribs, which hurt like hell. It was nothing Logan couldn't handle, Hell Weeks with dad were worse. Much. And in those times, he didn't have a gorgeous man to lay on. He'd take this over the alternative any day.

At last, Logan was greeted glacier blue eyes, and despite their tired appearance, were crinkled on the sides.

"Hmm...morning, kid." Keegan said, his was voiced laced with sleep, making it even more rasping and low, pooling warmth deep in his stomach.

"You're still here." Logan stated the obvious, a hand still rested on the edge of Keegan's jaw.

"You think I'd leave you? After I nearly got my ass kicked out of the building trying to get to you?" Keegan asked, staring down at him and quirking a smile that was so rare and warm, one he'd only seen flashed in his direction. He never took into account before that it meant something deeper, that he felt the same.

Logan yawned, the inhale made a knife sharp pain hit him in his injured ribs, he let out a quiet whoosh of air through a grimaced expression, he hid the pained look in the crook of Keegan's neck, the warm flesh tempting him once again, he kissed him once on either side of his adam's apple and moved back up, the moment of agony gone. Maybe he was a little worse off than he thought.

"Yeah, pretty stupid question." Logan said with a laugh, he was fighting the constant urge to kiss Keegan until his lips were bruised and swollen.

"I wouldn't say stupid..." Keegan whispered, his voice scratchy and low, vibrating Logan's body and pulling him in closer.

"It was a little stupid...at least 20% stupid."

"Then I 80% don't care if it was or wasn't, you're adorable." Keegan laughed throatily and kissed the top of Logan's head.

"You know that didn't make any sense, right Keegan?" Logan asked on the cusp of his own laughter.

"Hey, you can't expect me to make sense when I just woke up..."

Logan nodded, truth be told he wasn't sure if he himself made any sense...ever. He swept his eyes over Keegan's face, the older man's expression had softened significantly since he'd woken up, his brows were no longer pulled down in seemingly deep, unpleasant concentration, the corner of his mouth was curved upward, Logan traced the rounded point with his finger.

"Did you have a bad dream?" Logan questioned, his body memorized the impression of Keegan's hands digging into him, his ears replaying the sound of rough grunts and low speech.

"I - it's not really a dream, it's..a feeling I can't shake." Keegan murmured, his brows knit together just like in his sleep, the guarded look returned, now on his woken self.

Even though so much had been confessed, there was an lingering air of mystery misting its way around Keegan, Logan wondered if it'd always be like that. Would he be left wondering what was behind each frown that tugged at his lips, each lowering of his brows, and each crease between them? He wanted to uncover Keegan, more than literally, but peel away the layers, dive into the depths of his very being and learn the parts still hidden and uncharted by Logan.

Judging by Keegan's tense body language, Logan could sense that he didn't want to talk about it whatever 'feeling' it was that he couldn't shake. At least not in this moment. Logan smothered his budding curiosity and brought his hands up to Keegan's face again, stroking over his cheeks and knocking any and all troubling feelings from the older man's worn mind. It seemed effective, Keegan was lulled into peaceful state with muted thoughts at the touches from Logan, his eyes half closed in the comfort they brought.

"So...you and me?" Logan couldn't stop the question from leaving his mouth, his words and timing could be just as clumsy as he was, but he had to make sure that all of last night wasn't just a dream, no matter how lifelike this all felt.

Keegan's fingertips make contact with Logan's hair, to the pieces just around his ears. Oh, well that felt very real, he never felt something as real as Keegan's touch, he swallowed hard. Slowly, Keegan grazed his fingers down, feeling the side of his jaw. One thumb draws the line of his brows, another glides the straight firm bridge of his nose, unshaven cheeks are rough against his palms. It's like Keegan is mapping out every inch of his face, catching every detail like on the battlefield, nothing could escape his piercing arctic eyes.

"You and me, Logan." Keegan said, gruff, strong, and sure. That was Keegan, that had always been him. Logan sucked in a breath, taking care this time to not pull it in too deep. Keegan's words...only four and his chest was tight, his heart was racing, palms sweaty on the older man's chest. Crushes in high school never felt like this, nothing felt like this.

In the next moment, Logan found himself wrapped up tightly in Keegan's strong arms, it was that protective hold again. So he did it even when they were awake? What made Keegan feel like Logan needed to be protected and held so closely, besides the clumsy trips and falls during missions? Not that Logan had any complaints about being pressed tightly on Keegan. He pressed his face into Keegan's neck and breathed in his scent...he smelt good, like the sea and gunpowder twined into an intoxicating man, nothing like anything he'd smelt before..it was all Keegan.

"Keegan, um, your squishing some of my vital organs there." Logan struggled to get out, crushed to Keegan's body.

Keegan grunted, his exhale blowing pieces of Logan's hair, his hold didn't loosen, if anything he became all that more determined to cling to him, "I can't let go." He admitted thickly.

"You don't have to. Actually, um, I'd prefer it if you didn't let go of me. Ever." Logan said, Keegan's hand came up to brush on the side of his face again, cupping under his jaw and pulling  Logan's face to his. Logan's breathing stopped as he felt the heated breaths hitting his mouth.

"Think I could live with that.." Keegan murmured directly on Logan's lips before capturing them in a soft kiss, and, god, it's like laying on the beach in the sun, the heat hitting his face, warming him from head to toe, soaking into his skin. It makes him feel alive. Scaling buildings, close-calls with sharks? No, none of that made him feel as alive as kissing Keegan did. Logan moaned into the kiss and hoisted himself up, straddling Keegan and deepening the kiss, changing the nature of the it, hardening it and parting his lips to feel Keegan's tongue on his lips, his teeth, and finally, his tongue.

Logan wasn't an expert at picking the right moments for these kind of things, the worn down springs in the hospital mattress gave, squeaking loudly in the room when he rolled his hips forward into Keegan's, endless moans leaving between their open mouths. He could have kept going, he wanted it, needed it..for months. He's craved this moment, but the setting was all wrong, half of him demanded to push it further, slip his hands under Keegan's t-shirt and feel his taut abdomen, kiss his way across it until it became too much for the older man and he was flipped, covered by Keegan. The other half of him, the logical side, warned him to slow it down or come to complete halt. Logical side..yeah, right. Logan didn't give a fuck about logic right now, he only cared about Keegan, the other man's fingers still gentle on his face, the polar opposite of his hard groping on Keegan, slowly draining the rationality from his mind.

As he was working to pull Keegan's shirt off, there was a low murmur of voices outside the door, one of them Logan recognized instantly.

Logan tore away from Keegan's mouth and whispered, "Oh, fuck. Hesh." They both stared at each other wide-eyed for a moment before Logan flinged himself off of Keegan's body, a little too fast, a sharp pain flashed through his midsection, stealing his breath, his hands flew up to his ribs.

Despite the fact that Hesh was about to enter the room, Keegan rushed to his side in worry, his own hand lightly touching the wounded area on his torso, rubbing gentle circles and numbing the pain. "Shit, Logan, you need to be careful..."

Logan's eyes searched the older man's face, finding a huge cluster of concern hidden in his icy eyes, he knew he should remember this very look, for it would be gone in a minute with his brother's presence. He opened his mouth to speak but the door was busted open and Hesh entered the room, instantly moving to his younger brother's side.

"Logan! You ok?!" Hesh asked, examining Logan's body for injuries, eyes widening a bit a the large bandage around his otherwise bare abdomen. "I came as fast as I could, but I was out on a mission with Merrick and Kick, didn't hear what happened to you until a few hours ago." That was when Hesh finally noticed the other person in the room, Keegan, whose hand was still firmly but carefully in place on Logan's rib cage. Hesh gave him a confused look with deeply furrowed brows. "Keegan? You stay in here last night?"

"No. Just came in this morning to make sure he was alright. He got a little banged up on the mission." Keegan lied easily enough, and if Logan didn't know the real truth, than he would have believed the words Keegan spoke. Hesh turned his head in Logan's direction, silently asking him if what he said was true, he nodded in reply.

"I'm fine, bro. Keegan — uh — took care of me." Logan couldn't help the rush of heat that flashed on his cheeks and half-grin that pulled on his lips. Keegan took care of him alright, and if it wasn't for his brother walking in, he would have taken care of him for the rest of the day. Logan always had been a good bullshitter, just not with his brother. Hesh didn't look convinced, but he shook the expression off his face, tabling the round of questioning...for now.

"Yeah, ok cool. Thanks man." Hesh eyed Logan, trying to read his face but gave up and nodded at Keegan once, Keegan returned it and gave a small, warm smile to Logan when Hesh looked off to the side towards the hospital bed. "Oh, and there's somebody who's been dying to see you." Hesh said, putting two of his fingers together and whistling. Riley bounded into the room and bee-lined straight to Logan, nearly knocking him over and hitting his injured ribs when he jumped up.

"Riley! Hey, boy.." Logan kneeled down and pet Riley playfully rough, Riley made excited whining noises and licked all over Logan's face, pawing at his knee. "I missed you, buddy! Too bad we couldn't get you a doggie wet suit and send you down there with us." Logan baby talked Riley, now matter how much his father and brother disapproved of it, but he couldn't help it, he was so happy to see his dog that he didn't even get embarrassed using his high pitched voice right in front of Keegan.

Wrapped up in the greeting and affectionate assault from Riley, Logan was oblivious to Keegan off to the side, staring adoringly at him as he played with his dog, his gaze unguarded with its depth of emotion, though he kept a careful eye to make sure Hesh didn't catch him staring. Logan was completely unknowing that everything he did only made the Keegan fall harder for him, with the smiles and laughter, his bright spirit and mischievous spark, it steel-wired him to Logan, nothing could break it. No one was going to tear them apart.

"I swear, it's like that dog likes you more than me or something..." Hesh muttered with his arms crossed.

"Of course he does! I feed him treats and let him sleep on my bed. All you do is order him around and give him baths in that bathroom with the tiles..you know he hates slippery floors, dude." Logan retorted snickering, flashing a white smile at his brother.

"You know, what I said was supposed to set you up to reply, 'oh, don't worry Hesh, Riley likes you just as much'."

"I guess I'm not _always_ following your lead anymore." Logan objected with a shrug, the moment he said the words, he regretted them, the flash of hurt that showed in his brother's eyes made him feel guilty, but then he felt a radiating heat behind his head, he glanced up and saw Keegan looking down on him, his eyes holding enough warmth to ease the guilt he was drowning in.

"You hungry? Want something real to eat besides this hospital crap?" Hesh questioned after a minute of silence, leaning down to pet Riley behind his ears. Logan's words pushed out his head, he moved away from Logan and started to collect his brother's belongings.

"Hell yes!" Logan burst out, his stomach panging with a previously unknown hunger. He leaped off the ground and to his feet in a sudden move, a terrible idea, of course, in his wounded state. A hiss of pain unwillingly escaped through his teeth, in the next throb of pain, Keegan was there by his side with a hand on the small of his back, the other touching just outside his wound again.

"Hey, hey take it easy. You ok?" Keegan's voice not disguising the amount of concern he felt for Logan, it was all out there on the table for anyone to see, but Hesh was too distracted by gathering up Logan's things and looking over his injury chart to notice.

"It's no biggie.." Logan panted out, holding his bandaged ribs.

"You almost crippled over, kid. I'll go see if the doctor or nurse has some Tylenol. At least to take the edge off." Keegan's hand covered his, the older man's rough palm doing a good job of soothing the pain. Keegan turned his head around to see if Hesh was looking away before he kissed Logan on the side of his face, directly on a old scar nicked on his cheek.

Just like that, he was out of Keegan's embrace, the pain bubbling its way to the surface now that the pleasant sensations had been removed. Logan whined quietly in protest and Keegan laughed quietly, his shoulders softly bobbing up and down.

"I'll be right back. I promise." Keegan vowed him, leaving his side and exiting the room, his footfalls were silent on the sterilized floor, he turned back to look at Logan once, his gaze piercing and unreadable.

With Keegan out of sight, Logan unwrapped the bandage from around his torso, the unraveling revealed a deep bruising shade of purple, darker in the center of the left side of his rib cage, flecks of yellow speckled on the edges. His fingers prodded at the center of it, flinching at the ache, although it wasn't entirely unpleasant, Logan used to get covered in bruises during training and in his youth, he'd press down on the flesh to feel the twinge of pleasure that prickled his nerves. It was a habit he apparently hadn't outgrown. His eyes fell closed imagining Keegan pressing his fingers into the bruised flesh, the older man wouldn't be harsh, but the pressure he'd imprint on his injury would leave Logan a moaning mess. If he could even get Keegan to touch him in a less than gentle way when he was in this state.

"Holy shit, looks like you lost a fight." Hesh dropped Logan's pack to the bed and walked over to his younger brother. Logan's eyes flew open, his little fantasy interrupted, he shot a glare towards his brother.

"Yeah, with a fucking lighthouse." Logan muttered, rolling his eyes at Hesh. "A huge chunk fell right on me after we blew the sub, knocked my breathing tube clear off in the process.." Logan felt the sensation of suffocation again, the tingling in his limbs as they lost feeling, his vision blinking to fight the darkness..there was only one light left there. One person to keep him from falling under.

"Are you serious? So, if it wasn't for Keegan..." Hesh started, not wanting to finish the sentence, his eyes glanced over his brother's face before dropping to the floor.

"I'd be dead. No question." Logan stated clearly, his fist clenching at his side, Riley sat at his feet and peered up at him, as if he knew exactly what he had said.

Hesh swallowed hard and nodded to the door, a small smile on his lips, "Sounds like I owe him a drink, for saving my little brother."

"I don't need to be saved." Logan grumbled, securing the bandage back around his abdomen. Conflicting emotions battled inside of Logan, part of him was grateful for Keegan helping him, but he was getting tired of always being the one injured and caught in the crossfire, or the falling lighthouses. A trilling shudder ran through him at the thought of the crumbled structure.

Hesh knew his brother well enough to sense that he may have said the wrong thing, he dropped the subject.

There was a clean black shirt laid on the bed, Hesh picked it up and tossed it to Logan. The younger man thanked his brother and pulled the shirt over his head, fighting a cringe when it dragged across his stitched arm.

"What do you and Keegan even talk about? The guy barely says a word outside of missions, but you're always around him...and you two seem close." Hesh asked in a hushed whisper just in case Keegan walked through the door.

How was Logan supposed to answer that? What didn't they talk about? Keegan was the one person in the world he didn't care rambling on and on around or sitting in silence with, soaking in the other's company. "Um..we talk about everything." Logan answered, patting Riley on top of his head, the dog seemed to grin up at the youngest Ghost. The only thing on Logan's mind was wishing that Keegan would walk through the door and save him from the awkward question. Even if they still had to keep what was between them a secret...for now.

"Everything?" Hesh asked with a raised brow.

"Yeah, everything."

"That's specific."

"Can you drop the nosy older brother thing for a minute so we can go get some food?" Logan sighed, frowning at his brother, he shot a look to the door. Any day now, Keegan.

Hesh laughed and playfully ruffled his hand about in Logan's hair just like he did since they were kids, it was much different than how Keegan did it. His brother's was quick and messy, Keegan's was soft and lingering, fingers brushing at the crown of his head. Both touches were affectionate and loving, but only Keegan's had an extra layer of tender that made his heartbeat erratic.

"Sure, sure. You can consider it...postponed, I can't drop it forever." Hesh said, grinning at his brother and dodging the shove Logan almost gave him. "Too slow, Logan!" He laughed and recovered from his ducking position.

"Only because I'm injured, bro. Big accomplishment, you were faster than your wounded brother, wow. You should be so proud of yourself." Logan scoffed.

Hesh opened his mouth to direct a comeback of the verbal kind to Logan, since physical retorts were off the table, but right then, Keegan walked back in the room, a small plastic bag of pills in one hand and a cup of water in the other. It was then that Logan saw how messy Keegan's hair looked, the short strands were tousled and unruly, Logan had to suppress the affectionate smile from falling on his lips with the back of his unbandaged hand, but tried to convey the feeling in his eyes, his jaw clenched as Keegan closed the distance between them, both of their gazes never leaving the other.

Awkward silence was a bit of an understatement, only due to Hesh's presence in the room, Logan couldn't wait to leave and escape his brother's prying eyes.

"Uh, we ready to go?" Logan asked Hesh, relishing in the warmth of Keegan at his side again, it was a challenge to break his gaze away from the Keegan, he could feel his eyes on him the entire time he spoke.

"Almost, get your boots on and I'll finish packing up, then we're out of here." Hesh turned away from the two of them and resumed shoving Logan's belongings into the pack.

Logan let out an audible sigh of relief and faced Keegan, the two of them huddled close in the corner of the hospital room, Riley paced in front of them, sniffing the floor. Logan was a little surprised the staff allowed a dog, but not a man. Maybe they knew exactly what intentions Keegan and him had last night.

"Here, take four, it'll help more." Keegan said, dropping the pills into Logan's hand. Logan nodded and tossed them in his mouth, it looked as if Keegan wanted pour the water into the younger man's mouth himself as he lifted the cup to Logan's lips, Logan stole a look behind Keegan and saw that Hesh was still occupied, so he allowed Keegan to do the gesture, he would have been humiliated, but the soft look in Keegan's eyes eradicated that feeling fast, the way his gaze shifted to his throat when he swallowed, flashing heat on Logan's skin. Apparently, Keegan just wanted to take care of him and...check him out, both things were something he wasn't used to.

"Why'd you do that?" Logan asked after he drank down the water, wiping his wettened lips with the back of his unwrapped hand.

Keegan shrugged, "Just wanted to." He stole a quick kiss on Logan's damp mouth.

"You can 'just want to' again, I mean, I wouldn't exactly be against that. I never got to fulfill my promise, making you sick of kissing me." Logan murmured under his breath.

"Pretty sure you tried to make me sick of it and failed, like I predicted. I still want you more than ever, kid." Keegan spoke roughly, a ghost of his touch lingered on Logan's face when Keegan lifted his hand up.

But Hesh was there the next moment, pack slinged over his shoulder, his head jutted to the door. "Come on, when Kick is hungry, he's the biggest ass ever." Hesh said, unaware of Keegan's hand dropping back to his side.

"Finally!" Logan grunted, already halfway to the door.

"Then there's you, impatient and grouchy." Hesh jogged to meet up with his brother.

"I don't think he's so bad." Keegan said breezily from behind, a knowing glance shot at Logan, kisses imprinted on his and Logan's lips from last night, this morning, a few moments ago, not so easily forgotten. And the promise of more left a thrilling feeling in both men.

* * *

Regardless of California's all but obliterated state, there were places that served meals despite the destruction of ODIN, places that strive to maintain some since of normality in a wrecked world, Cortina's was that place. A car full of hungry guys was more than likely driving the oldest Ghost mad. Merrick and Elias took driver and shotgun, Elias tapping at the steering wheel the entire drive and speaking to everyone when they passed an outpost, or a refugee neighborhood or shelter.

Riley was riding with them, like they could leave the loyal dog behind now that his favorite human was back in the pack, he settled himself right between Keegan and Logan in the back row of the SUV, separating them, but maybe that was a good thing, it kept Logan from sneaking a wandering hand on Keegan's thigh or doing that cheesy yawn, arm over shoulder move he saw in movies when he was a teenager. Logan had never been in a relationship before, so Riley blocking Logan from doing something he might regret was for the best, most likely.

The road was bumpy, if it wasn't for Riley planted in the middle seat, they'd be bumping into each other like Kick and Hesh were, shoving off the other and shooting obscenities, acting more like riled up teenagers rather than two grown men. Hesh's usually serious and conservative image could falter every now and then. It was nice to see him relax, the reaction seemed to only be felt by Logan, their dad looked upset about something and Hesh was only pushing it.

"Will you boys quiet it down? The back seat isn't the place for a damn death match." Elias ordered over their loud shouts. It was effective, the two men snapped upright at command, Logan could see Merrick smirking in the rear view mirror.

While Keegan and Logan exchanged an amused glance, Riley turned to the older Sergeant and licked his face, a deep chuckle left Keegan's mouth, quieted when the German Shepherd laid down and rested his head on his lap. Logan felt a fond smile fall on his lips seeing Keegan pet between Riley's ears, he was too caught up in the adorable scene to notice Keegan's right hand sneak behind the dog's lazy form and grab Logan's hand, his thumb grazing over the younger man's knuckle, a private touch, intimate. It could hold him over till they could be alone, safe from their friends' eyes.

Logan almost nodded off himself, his head falling to the side, clumsily evading Keegan's shoulder. It was an awkward angle thanks to the large dog wedged there, his neck felt a prickle of pain, so he shook his head as if to rid the sleepy comfort he felt next to Keegan. It was deceitful, the situation, they weren't alone in the car, his brother, his dad, his friends, any of them could see if he went there and moved Riley out of the way, cuddle under Keegan's arm and allow himself to nap under the warmth of his embrace. He wanted to, his body ached for it, and Keegan's eyes told him he felt the same, his hand tightened around Logan's as his head fell back on the car's head rest, his gaze never leaving Logan.

For once, Logan couldn't wait for lunch to be over.

* * *

The outdoor patio of Cortina's was misleading, Logan could pretend that he was in the past, on a family dinner with Hesh and their dad..and mom during their time on leave. They'd eat out on the rare night Hesh and Logan could pout enough at their parents and convince them. Elias usually cooked, most of the time it was barbecues in the backyard, family and friends all around while Hesh and Logan swam in the pool and wrestled till their skin pruned, not getting out until their dad walked to the edge of the pool with his hands on his hips, a smile on his face and light in his eyes that Logan hadn't seen since his mother passed. The light wasn't missing now, only dulled, Logan could see it when he spoke to Hesh or him, telling them how proud he was, he always let them know, said those words more than 'I love you', but it was like they were weaved in. Walkers displayed their affection by watching each other's backs, compliments, and a well earned pat on the back.

Looking back on those days, Logan wondered where Merrick and Keegan fit into his parents lives, they had to know each other in those days. Secretly, Logan was relieved that Keegan never got the chance to witness him in his gangly, lanky and somehow even more clumsy youth. Even photos from that time were lost in the fires left by ODIN.

"I'll take uh, Italian Sub, foot long." Logan told the waiter, patting his stomach in the process.

"Woah, sure you can finish all that, Logan?" Hesh chided across from him, that stupid smirk on his face.

Logan rolled his eyes, "I'm not 10 anymore, thank you very much. I think I can devour it all, no problem." He muttered under his breath, kicking Hesh's shin under the table, hopefully conveying, _'I swear, Hesh, if you embarrass me in front of the waiter and Keegan I'll shave your precious sideburns off in your sleep.'_ Wouldn't be the first time he's threatened that very same thing, and he's most definitely resorted to doing it before. Let's just say that Hesh wasn't always so conservative.

Seated at the carefully restored to their pre-ODIN glory painted white table and chairs, Logan and Keegan's elbows bumped together, Logan glanced over to Keegan beside him, a sharp intake of breath stuck in his throat as he caught sight of the sun hitting on Keegan's face, his pale skin, sharp cheekbones over hallow shadows, dark brows pulled down over deep set icy eyes, brooding yet illuminated in the light. This man was his, they belonged to each other, Logan bit back the audible contented sigh from leaving his mouth at the prospect, his dad was sitting right next to him and there was no doubt he'd hear the swoon if he didn't crush it before it escaped. Instead, Logan shifted his right knee, nudging it into Keegan's while Hesh and Merrick argued if the lasagna pan was a bit excessive for two people, Merrick made a fair point that he could easily clean four plates after chasing down and saving Hesh's ass during their mission yesterday. That shut Hesh up. Logan gave major props to Merrick for that, getting Hesh to be quiet was no easy feat, he's tried with no success many times.

"I don't know about you guys, but four plates is nothing, I could take down at least half a pan single-handedly. It takes a lot out of a man sitting behind a computer directing you two through a Fed base, exhausting." Kick commented with a shrug, leaning back in his chair, stretching his arms and putting them behind his head.

"Everyone feels so sorry for you, Kick." Merrick said dryly, cocking his head in Kick's direction with a lifted brow.

"Hey, you two would have been dead on arrival if I didn't hack the security cams!" Kick shot back.

"Um, should we really be discussing mission sensitive data at lunch..in public?" Logan questioned with a raised brow, glancing at the men across from him, the next second later Keegan's hand covered his under the table.

"No, we shouldn't." Elias agreed, shooting a look at the three men at the table, specifically at Kick, then turned to face Logan. "How are you holding up, son?" He asked Logan.

Logan's head snapped to his dad and caught him staring at his stitched wrist. "Huh, me? I feel fine, dad." Logan answered. Fine meaning _, 'Dad, I feel pretty much like the happiest guy in the world right now, getting crushed by a lighthouse is the last thing on my mind when I have Keegan looking at me like that.'_ But he held his tongue, although sharing the reason for the smiling on his face was tempting _._ "You can't tell me this is close to being as bad as that week in Elfin Forest up in San Diego a couple years back." He said, shaking his head and huffing out a rush of air.

A cringe mirrored on both Elias' and Logan's faces at the memory.

"Can't say that it is." Elias gave a small chuckle, all warm and fatherly, only now would the event be amusing in the least. Particularly to Logan, who'd taken the beating.

Of course all of Keegan's attention was focused on Logan and his superior, Logan's father, his hand never leaving Logan's. Even a hard introvert like him could be filled with curiosity. "Elfin Forest? Was it on the Obsidian Trail? I heard that one is pretty treacherous, even before ODIN." Keegan asked, leaning in closer to both of them.

The oldest Ghost seemed to be a bit taken aback at hearing Keegan join in a normal conversation, but a smile perked up on the sides of his mouth. "Sure was, Logan took a spill on a combat exercise..."

"A spill? Dad, I fell out of a tree." Logan rubbed the back of his neck, squinting through the bright sun to stare at his dad, then back to Keegan, giving him a sheepish smile, Keegan shot him what might have been a smile if it wasn't so controlled.

Keegan couldn't help the short laugh of shock that came out. "A tree? How the hell did you manage that?"

"Branch snapped." Elias and Logan said in unison, both of them shared a laugh, an easy, fond smile fell on Keegan's mouth watching the father and son, his other hand moved across his lap, holding Logan's single hand firmly between both of his, the two of them couldn't care less how sweaty their palms were getting in the summer heat.

"How...how high up were you?" Keegan asked, a little worried about Logan, no matter how long ago he was hurt. He couldn't help it - it was instinctive, a knee-jerk reaction, it had been since they met, his consciousness always drifted to the younger Sergeant, keeping a close eye on him.

"Not too high, about, uh..13 feet?" Logan answered, turning to his father with a questioning look.

"Give or take, that's about close enough." Elias confirmed with a nod. "Anyways, Logan fell into a boulder, dislocated his shoulder, Hesh and me wouldn't have even known if he didn't tell us. Set the thing back himself, patched up his busted knee, and was on his feet right after. Found us down the trail acting like nothing was wrong..fought through the pain and focused on the mission. Couldn't believe it, but that's Logan..he's tough as nails, nothing could break him. I was so proud of him..I am proud of him." Elias finished.

A strong hand clamped on Logan's shoulder, the younger man knew that if his dad looked down, he'd be able to make out the hand holding that was going on, but somehow, even if he did, Logan wouldn't mind. Not one bit. Elias never looked down though, a smile fixed on his mouth, the dulled light in his eyes there again.

"Daaad..." Logan drawled out, shifting uncomfortably in the plastic chair, a flush rose on his cheeks from his dad's words. He really loathed how easily he blushed.

"Logan's an amazing soldier, the best I've seen. I wouldn't want anyone else but him on my side. He's a...good man." Keegan said thickly, he wasn't doing his usual best at disguising his emotions, Logan could read through the words and find the hidden meanings there, how much he loved him. But in the next moment, Keegan's piercing yet soft gaze was dropped and became significantly more reserved.

"He is."

"Ugh, now both of you?" Logan groaned. He would have brought both of his hands up to cover his face, but there was no way he was removing his hand from Keegan's double hold, one would have to do. Peeking through his fingers he saw his dad and Keegan sharing a laugh - wait...Keegan never laughed with anyone else, and now he was doing it openly, with his dad of all people. Logan wasn't sure if he was hungry anymore, he felt full of something else. Affection? Love? A relief that maybe his dad wouldn't object to his and Keegan's relationship after all? Not that there was anything he could do to break them apart, two grown men, forged together, held in a unbreakable dual grasp. Full, yeah...he felt full. It was happiness, and shit...Hesh might be right, he wasn't sure he'd be able to finish that sandwich now.

* * *

Back at the base, every single Ghosts' stomach was stuffed to the limit from lunch. All of them were making pathetic groaning noises and cursing themselves for overindulging. All of them meaning Logan and Kick. Merrick would never admit to any kind of discomfort, and Hesh was the type to suffer in silence, making ridiculous faces in the process while holding his stomach and keeled over, Keegan and Elias, well, both of them were smarter than the rest and didn't stuff themselves in the first place. Earlier, Logan thought he was full of something, oh yeah, he was full alright, full of regret for playing right into his brother's fighting words. A fucking foot, sure, it felt like six by the end.

Apparently they had a free day. That's what Elias told them, 24 hours to kill time before they stormed the Federation's weapon factory in Rio De Janeiro. Which meant that Keegan and Logan had a few hours just for themselves outside of a mission or hospital room and all Logan wanted to do was take a nap. A _nap_. Logan was beyond irritated with himself, the Tylenol Keegan gave him earlier all but numbed the pain, thankfully, but it made him sleepy as well. It started when he almost dozed off in the car on Keegan's shoulder, then on the way back from lunch, and now, at the Ghosts' home base, his eyes were dropping closed even when he walked.

"You want me to help you to your room?" Keegan asked Logan, watching him intake his fourth long yawn since they entered the garage.

"I don't - mm'not tired.." Logan mumbled, batting a hand about in the air in Keegan's direction, the other scratching the top of his head, ruffling his light locks of hair.

"Kid, you're acting like your feet are being weighed down by a cement block." Keegan took Logan's arm and placed it over his shoulder to support his weight.

"Logan? You ok?" Elias asked bounding down the stairs. He walked over to Keegan and a very sluggish, about to pass out looking Logan, and placed a hand on his son's forehead, then patted lightly down the side of his face, finding nothing out of sorts with his temperature.

"Keeeegie, was the Tylenol that PM shit?" Logan frowned at his dad's hand and was too drowsy to notice he used the nickname he gave Keegan, which was previously unsaid to the sniper, right in front of his dad. He was far gone enough that he would have gladly fall asleep under Keegan's arm in the garage, it was tempting, even if his dad was giving him concerned looks.

"They didn't tell me, but judging by how you are right now, I think it's safe to say it was. It might've been all they had?" Keegan shrugged at the look that both Elias and Logan shot at him, Logan's annoyed expression, brows pulled down and eyes nearly closed, and Elias, his face blank, but amused.

"How many did he take?" Elias asked Keegan.

"...Four." Keegan answered.

"Come on, let's get him to his bed." Elias directed at Keegan, laughing at the glare Logan gave him. "You need to sleep it off."

"Ugh..." Logan grunted as Elias carefully slinged his injured arm over his shoulder, Keegan and his dad walked him up the staircase leading into the base.

Merrick saw them basically dragging Logan through the main floor, he almost walked past, but did a double take and jogged over to them. "He alright?" Merrick asked, jutting his chin at Logan, who was smiling sleepily up at Keegan, unaware of anyone else in the room.

"Took some...nighttime pain reliever." Keegan replied, giving Logan a small smile before looking back at Merrick.

"Sure. And he destroyed that sandwich in under 10 minutes, boy's feeling it now. He's in good company, Kick passed out by the computer monitors and I think Hesh is...hiding somewhere, in misery." Merrick said with a chuckle.

"Those nurses wanted to drug me! Don't they know I'm a soldier?!" Logan shouted, nearly stumbling out of Elias and Keegan's hold, they caught him before he could rip his stitches from the impact.

All three men stared at Logan, then to each other.

"Ok...maybe it was the medicine..." Merrick said with a slow nod of his head and crossing his arms. "Anyways, Elias, Command's on the COMM, they need to speak to you and me about the factory, got some more details about what exactly the boys and me will be dropped into tomorrow night."

"Copy that. Keegan?" Elias hesitated in leaving.

"Don't worry, I'll take care of him." Keegan assured Elias softly, giving a solid nod of his head to his superior.

"Thanks, Keegan," Elias leaned in a little closer, "I appreciate you looking out for my boy." He removed Logan's arm from his shoulder and patted Keegan on the back as he left down the right hall to the COMM room. Merrick stood there for a moment, a look a cast in Keegan's direction, eyes slit, an unreadable expression on his face as he watched Keegan and Logan.

"Something wrong, Merrick?" Keegan asked, shifting his weight on his feet and holding Logan's head to his chest, trying not to look down at the adorably tired younger man in his arms, his friend's odd stare throwing him off a bit.

Merrick was silent for a few seconds, then uncrossed his arms, his face still not conveying much of any emotion, "It's nothing. Make sure he gets some sleep. And you too. Long two days ahead of us." Merrick dismissed, glancing down once more at Logan, who looked more than comfortable laying on Keegan, and turning to leave.

The whole awkward moment was lost to Logan, due to him being pretty much unconscious in Keegan's arms. Keegan reached for Logan's other arm to balance him, but just as he did, Logan wrapped it across his chest, borrowing into him even though they were still standing. Keegan smiled down at him as he led him to the door of his room and opened the door, Logan leaning on him completely. The room was small and dark with the curtains drawn, Logan's eye lids won the battle and closed.

"Why'd you take me here? I wanna be in your room..." Logan whined as Keegan helped him the bed, fluffing a pillow before resting Logan's head on it, refluffing the edges after.

"Would you like to tell everyone about us right now?" Keegan questioned with a quiet sigh, pausing pulling off Logan's boots to glance at him.

"Not really..." Logan stretched his legs on the bed, thinking that it felt pretty comfortable, but having Keegan to lay on would be a huge improvement.

Suddenly, Riley busted through the half-closed door and instantly jumped onto the bed, licking Logan's face, making the youngest Ghost give weary laugh. Keegan stroked his hand on the side of Logan's face, joining in the laugh, rasping and hushed. The dog licked Keegan's hand twice before settling himself at the end of Logan's bed. Lunch must have tuckered out the usually active dog as well.

Logan nuzzled his face into Keegan's hand, kissing the inside of his palm. "Look, Riley knows, he doesn't care..." Logan mumbled.

"Shh, you need to get some rest, kid." Keegan said with a fond smile, running his fingers through Logan's hair.

"What I need is my pants off." Logan tried his best to sound seductive, but his voice came out cracking and slurred, he frowned at the laugh that left Keegan's mouth.

"Ok..." Keegan dragged his hand down Logan's body, stopping at the button on his cargos, if Logan was more awake, he's sure his heart would be beating into overdrive. But he did feel...bold right now. Damn that Tylenol.

"Hey, uh, during that mission yesterday, did you tell me to get down just so your ass would be in my face? Because that was smooth, so smooth, I mean you know how to make a focused soldier become a sexually frustrated mess in a second." Logan spewed out. He'd regret saying that later, but right now the dumbstruck look on Keegan's face as he undid the button on Logan's pants made it worth it.

Dragging the pants off of Logan's legs, Keegan swallowed hard and looked up at Logan. "No? You just needed...to get down. Or the Feds would have saw you."

"But I could have went next to you."

"I — look, kid — Logan..." The pants were removed, Keegan stood and folded them neatly and placed them on Logan's nightstand. "Try and get some sleep, ok?" Keegan whispered, sitting on the bed next to Logan, certainly not looking over Logan's pantless body.

"Mmm..sleep..ok.." Logan turned over on his side so he was facing Keegan, the sleepy smile returned to his lips.

Keegan opened his mouth to speak, but when he glanced down at Logan, he saw the younger man's eyes closed, lips parted slightly. The sniper took in a deep breath, a tight smile on his lips. He watches Logan peacefully rest a minute or two, assuring himself that he was content and fine, then got off the bed and lifted Logan's legs a little to get him under the blanket, he knew how cold Logan could get when he was sleeping.

As he tucked Logan in the blanket and made sure his bandages were secure and covering his wounds, he heard a soft noise, barely spoken.

"Keegan...hmm...fucking shark, don't..eat my boyfriend." Logan mumbled in his sleep, turning his head anxiously.

Keegan could tell the younger man was anxious, as ridiculous as the dream sounded, so he brushed his hand over Logan's face. "You got him, Logan. You saved me." Keegan whispered into the younger man's ear, a smile tugging on his lips.

"See...mm'I can save you too...even from..fuckin sharks.." Logan grumbled, looking content again, his head nudging into Keegan's hand on his face.

Leaning down, Keegan kissed Logan's temple, he closed his eyes and felt the younger man's heartbeat thumping through the pulse point on his lips. "You already saved me, kid..way before the fucking sharks." He pulled away and secured the blanket around Logan, his hand slid down Logan's body, lingering on his hip before he lifted it off.

Riley's head raised of the bed as he walked by, whining quietly when he moved to the door. "Hey buddy, watch over him for me, ok?" Keegan scratched Riley behind his ears and saw a glint in the dog's deep brown eyes, like he understood his request, his head turned to the side before he moved closer to Logan and laid his head on the youngest Ghosts' leg. Keegan hesitated at the doorway, giving one last look to Logan's sleeping form, his back faced him, but he looked comfortable and safe. Only then did Keegan leave the room, reluctantly, his jaw hurting from all the smiling he's done in the past 24 hours, more in that short amount of time than in his 35 years of life, all because a clumsy Walker with a boyish grin and soul still unaffected by the years of war, the brightness held within it was enough to seep through to his own, giving him a new hope. He was saved.

* * *

'Fucking dark', 'Why is it so fucking dark?' Eloquent thoughts were far from Logan's mind as he shot up in bed, bad move, a spike of dull pain hit him in the ribs at the sudden move.

"Keegan?" Logan whispered in the room, his voice wobbly and high pitched from the hours of sleep, but there was no response. Ok, last thing he remembered was...oh shit, saying something to Keegan about his ass being in his face? _'Wow, good one, Logan'_ he groaned in embarrassment at the memory and reached for the bedside lamp to flick on the light. Which was blindly bright to his dark-adjusted eyes. The clock read 10:15 pm. He'd been asleep for around 5 hours, which, in nap-time world, felt like 10 years.

Logan frowned at the empty spot on the bed next to him, he must have not been as good at convincing Keegan to stay as he was last night. He blamed it on the Tylenol. Logan clambered out of bed, nearly tripping over the blanket, and found his pants on the bedside table. He reached into the front pocket and plucked out the plastic bag of pills.

"You little fuckers.." Logan glowered at the deceptively innocent caplets and tossed them in the garbage bin. He'd rather fight through the pain than make a complete ass out of himself, thank you very much.

Despite the fact that they only spent one night together, officially, snuggled up in bed, it still felt..unnatural for Keegan not to be in the room. Mostly for the fact that Keegan was always around when he napped...always. He'd wake up and there would be Keegan, sitting in the chair in the break room, reading and sending him a soft smile when he woke up that made his heart flutter in his drowsy state. But he didn't get that this time, only a dark room, and a lazy Riley, peering up at him with tired eyes that fell closed as he paced in front of the bed. Letting out a sigh Logan looked back at his disarrayed bed, he knew he wouldn't be able to fall back asleep anytime soon. He missed Keegan, missed his solid chest and battle-worn hands that held his own in a tight yet gentle grasp, the raspy laughter that was still fresh and new to his ears, he craved it all, every part of him. So what the hell was he doing in this room without him?

Logan walked to the door of his room, Riley jumped off the bed to follow him. "Riley, stay. Stay." He loved the dog more than he could say, but...the things he had on his mind were not suitable for his dog to present during. Riley obliged and hopped back on the bed, appearing to sigh before he fell back to sleep.

The door creaked in the hallway when Logan opened it, his head peeked out and looked down both sides to find them empty and dimmed from the night. Logan exited his room, not really caring that he was dressed only in his boxers and a t-shirt, and walked down the hall. Keegan's room was around the corner, the furthest away from everyone else's, and therefore, the most private. It felt like he was being pulled towards it by an invisible force, maybe that force was the connection between them, either way it led him to Keegan's door. Logan halted outside of it and listened carefully, there was no talking inside and the light looked dim under the door.

Making a fist, Logan rapped on Keegan's door as quietly as he could manage, shooting a look down the corner of the hallway, paranoid that someone heard. For a bit there was no response, just three seconds of unbearable silence.

Then, the door opened and there stood Keegan, shirtless and dressed only in boxers that cling to his lean hips, his black hair was damp, messy, and disheveled, obviously fresh out of the shower. No mask, no trace of face paint, no fatigues, he was laid bare, and to put simply, fucking gorgeous, a rise of heat prickled at his face and his mouth gaped open, he felt a tingle in his fingers to reach out and feel the older man's body, the deep scars that were revealed to him on his torso, but Keegan didn't attempt to hide them. Silently to himself, Logan wondered how many of Keegan's scars were from that story his dad told him when he was younger. The Ghosts, huh, once a seemingly unrealistic fairy tale of the tragic, war torn kind, but now he was a Ghost himself, ...and appallingly attracted to and in love with one, the taller, lean and cut man before him, with his soft gaze contradicted by electric blue eyes, and that line of freckles Logan had noticed many times before, actually became a bit obsessed with on the way to missions, finally told him what he always wanted to know, they did reach down to the base of his neck. He wanted to kiss each one, he might have to avoid the scars that laid in the way, could they be too personal and riddled with horrific memories for Logan to touch? All that was clear now was the goal in mind to get into Keegan's bed. He was confident about it, after all, it worked last night.

"Hey..." Keegan greeted Logan with smile that said he'd been expecting the younger man to show up at some point, like he planned this whole thing, down to taking a shower and looking impossibly sexy and damp, smelling like soap and a lingering trace of gunpowder that was etched into his skin.

"Can I come in?" Logan asked innocently, trying to avert his gaze from Keegan's body, it was the least dressed he'd ever seen the older man, and a shocking flash of lust skyrocketed his heartbeat at the sight of his long muscular torso, the dip on the center of his chest, and the cut v-shape on his hips that disappeared under the band of his boxers.

"You don't even need to ask, kid. Come here." Keegan said in his gruff voice. He took Logan by his unbandaged hand and pulled him into the room before another Ghost could see them standing half naked outside the door.

"You have a good nap?" Keegan came up behind Logan and pressed a kiss to the side of his face.

Logan lifted and dropped his shoulders. "Can't complain, all I know is that Tylenol is on my shit list from now on." He answered, scratching his chin and dropping his gaze to Keegan's ass as he walked by and picked up his towel, throwing it to a chair in the corner. There'd been several missions where Logan was almost baited into staring at Keegan's body, like Keegan wanted him to. He'd be lying if he said he didn't look every time.

"Sorry about that, by the way. I should have asked if they were regular or 'that PM shit'." Keegan said with a smirk, leaning on his dresser, using quoting fingers at the end.

"Ugh, I'm off that crap for the rest of my life. Can you do me a favor and please forget everything I said when I was...under the influence?" Logan flashed him a slight pout.

"Hmm...no." Keegan chuckled quietly at Logan's flushed face. To be fair, if Keegan was in a intoxicated-like state and said mortifying things, he wouldn't be able to forget it either. It was hard enough to not forget every look on his face, every word he spoke.

"Ugh, fine." Logan muttered, he wasn't really bothered, if Keegan loved him in spite of his many flaws, why would he stop after a few embarrassing words. "I could make a habit out of this." He said sitting on the side of Keegan's bed and feeling the mattress under his fingers, the texture of his blanket, though identical to his, felt more appealing to touch. He looked around the room and found it bare not one trace of a personal touch from the sniper on the walls, just his dog tags on the bedside table. Logan's seen more of his things in the break room, they spent most of their time there anyways.

"You should..." Keegan sat down next to him on the bed and wrapped an arm around his shoulders.

"Yeah?" Logan's head turned to him, a smile played on his lips.

"You can sleep in my room every night, Logan. In fact, I'd encourage it." Keegan said, pulling him tighter and pressing a kiss to his cheek. "But won't Riley be a little upset?" He added jokingly, a small smile on his lips remembering the Walker sibling tussle about the dog earlier that day.

"Pshh, Riley is fine. I think he just likes sleeping in my bed...maybe..I mean, he did try to follow me on the way here." Logan trailed off, fiddling with the paracord bracelet on his right wrist, Keegan's gaze flicked down to it, eyeing it curiously like he did from time to time, as if he thought that Logan was a bit of a mystery too.

"He did?"

"Uh huh.." They both laughed quietly in the dim lighting of Keegan's room, Logan wouldn't have cared if Riley were present if this was a normal night, but it was obvious now where this was heading, it'd been building up to this moment for months.

"Shit, if he ran down the hall he probably would've alerted everyone else about what we're up to right now." Keegan said shooting a look to the door.

"True, not sure I'd want them to walk in on this." Logan's gaze dropped to Keegan's sneaky smile.

"Ha, it would be hard to talk our way out of it. We couldn't really say we're in the middle of friendly conversation with me and you sitting on the bed half naked.."

"Not that exactly..." Logan trailed off and scooted closer to Keegan, his arm winded across the older man's firm chest, a hand coming to rest on his shoulder, pulling Keegan closer, his breath warming the sniper's lips. "I have a promise to carry out."

"I told you already, it won't work." Keegan licked his bottom lip, his eyes focused on Logan's mouth.

"Dad always told me, if you have a goal, don't just sit there, gather the courage to believe you can succeeded..pretty sure I've been misinterpreting all of dad's advice lately, but still I — "

Logan was, thankfully, cut off with a kiss from Keegan, the first kiss in hours, soft and longing from the time of no contact. Logan let out a muted moan in his throat at the instant relief that rushed through his body. Keegan pulled Logan on top of him with a grunt, situating them both further up the bed, their combined weight seemed effortless for the him to maneuver.

Keegan's body was taut and solid, you wouldn't think that his muscular build would be warm and soft, being on top of him was a figment of his fantasies on the couch, not something that was supposed to come true, but it did, and here he was, kissing him. Logan ran his hands over Keegan's bare sides, his smooth skin gliding over his fingers like silk, but he could feel the flicks and dips of the scars on him, Keegan tensed up into the kiss, his lips paused in moving against his own. Logan broke away from the kiss and looked Keegan in the eyes.

"It's ok. I know I have a lot of scars..I'm a damaged package." Keegan gave Logan an apologetic smile, caressing his fingers over the side of the younger man's neck, over the stubble on his chin.

"No you're not..you're perfect. And they're beautiful, actually, as stupid as it sounds." Logan said breathlessly, his brows pinched together.

Hesitantly, Logan kissed a scar under Keegan's lips and pulled back to see how Keegan reacted to it. A small nod and a trusting look in Keegan's eyes was what he got, it was a gesture of consent. Logan kissed him on the lips once more before he dipped his head and kissed the line of freckles on Keegan's neck that led to the base of his throat, the ones that were exposed to him when he first knocked on the door. His fingers moved down, tracing a scar on his chest and the smaller ones nicked beside it, Keegan's breathing subdued, his chest stilled as the younger man's fingers moved across it.

Logan was trying to rewrite the darkness that came with each mark on the older man, fill the pain and memories they left with all the love for him Logan had bottled up inside for months. The lower he got the more heady Keegan's breaths became, but he was still relaxed into the bed. Logan rubbed his stubbled jaw on the largest scar on Keegan, the one that ran across his stomach, it took up half of the expanse of his skin there.

Kissing his way back up Keegan's body and savoring one more on his lips, Logan pulled away, "What happened there?" Logan asked in a hushed whisper, soothing fingers gliding across the huge scar.

Keegan cleared his throat and kissed an old nick on the side of Logan's face, "That was my first scar, back when I was in the Marines. I was shot by another during a mission and the bullet lodged in my stomach. Good thing he was a shitty shot. The bullet wasn't in too deep, but it stuck there through the rest of the fight. When my squad rushed me into the back of a tank turned into a make shift hospital, they had to remove it because there was no way we'd get to doctor in time. Let's just say none of the guys had the best surgical skills." Keegan said with a grimace, the pain left a violet shade in an otherwise black and white memory.

"Are you serious? That's badass, you kept fighting after you got shot in the fucking stomach..." Logan said, blinking in disbelief down at Keegan, feeling a little inadequate compared to the older man.

"I had no choice. Either fight or be responsible for the deaths of my team..they counted on me, I was the sniper watching their backs, the eyes where they can't see."

"You're always looking out for everyone else.."

"Some more than others." A grin edged on Keegan's mouth, Logan shook his head with a laugh and kissed him soundly on his smiling lips and pulling away.

"But..um..that's a big scar for a botched surgery.." Logan said, his fingers remained on the scar, moving down lower in each passing second.

"Believe it or not, most of that is from the bullet's impact, not the alcohol soaked tactical knife."

"I think we match, I've got at least 100 scars..but at least your's have cool, heroic stories behind them, most of mine are a result of my...less than graceful ways."

"They're still sexy to me." Keegan's voice was low, vibrating in his throat and the bed, his eyes crinkled on the sides, a smile hidden there instead of on his lips.

Logan let out a groan, "Oh god, don't give me those eyes." He covered Keegan's eyes for a moment, peeking his fingers open to see the arctic blue clearly even in the dim light of the room.

"What are you talking about?" Keegan asked through a husky laugh, removing Logan's hand and pressing a kiss to his knuckle. It was a weak hold, Logan pulled out of it and traced the curve on the edge of Keegan's mouth to the lines on the sides of his eyes.

"Um, it's nothing...I've just..wanted you for so long..and now I don't know.."

"I understand, more than you know." Keegan placed his thumb in the dip on Logan's chin and pulled his face closer to his own, their lips meeting again. It's new still, the feeling of it, they've both kissed others before, but never like this, never with someone who meant this much. Logan's hands ran down Keegan's body, over the scars again, Keegan's free hand did the same, feeling the indented, jagged lines on the younger man's broad back, dipped between muscles and tanned skin, freckled throughout, both of them memorizing each one.

Logan would rather not think about the last time he was in a situation similar to this, similar only in the actions, not the feelings, not the person he was touching, just the kissing, the means to where it, hopefully, would end. Logan wasn't like his friends, he couldn't see the nearest decent looking person and lay with them like this, well, he could never lay with anyone exactly like this, unless they were Keegan.

A groan left Logan's tightened throat as Keegan's hands ventured over his shirt and paused on his bandaged torso, he wanted to beg Keegan to dig his hands into the bruised flesh so he could feel that ache of pain and pulse of pleasure that followed. He wanted to, but he resisted knowing Keegan wouldn't do it, even if he did beg, because Keegan would never hurt him, permission given or not. He'd have to show the older Sergeant how amazing it felt to be a little rough when he wasn't...bandaged up and trying to keep his stitches together for at least the night. But being a little banged up wasn't going to stop him from doing this. Boldly, Logan lowered his hands, sweeping them over Keegan's taut stomach, feeling the him shudder in response to the touch, then down, to the band of the man's boxers, his fingers feeling under the elastic.

Keegan broke away from the heated kiss, panting, "Logan...hey, slow down." his hand rested on Logan's, pausing the younger man from pulling down his boxers. "Don't you think we should we take this slow?"

"Slow? Keegan, I've wanted this for months. And you..?" Logan asked, a harsh shock of self-consciousness hit him. Was he the only one who wanted to do this right now?

"I want to." Keegan answered huskily, his hands coming up to stoke Logan on the side of the younger Sergeant's face, sensing his inner conflict, and kissed him down his rough cheek, and lastly on his lips. "Don't doubt that."

Logan was renewed with a burst of confidence, "Then we've taken it slow enough."

Keegan's eyes swept all over his face, checking each feeling in the other man's deep brown eyes, no matter how subtle. "Yeah...you're right. But, kid, we still have to take it slow."

"Keegaaan." Logan whined, beyond frustrated, sexually, literally, the whole nine yards. He didn't want to seem desperate and pleading, but he was close to it, close enough to not care, especially when Keegan flashed him a small smirk, taking Logan's hands in his own and moving them to his hips, at the band of his boxers.

"I meant we have to do _this_ slow...you're not exactly in top shape right now."

"Who cares?" Logan rolled his eyes, and his hips for good measure, just to hear the groan from the back of Keegan's throat.

"I care. I'm not going to take the chance and up hurting you... And when was the last time you did this?"

"Keegan, come on, is that really necessary for me to explain?" Embarrassment once again found itself in Logan, not that it was something new. He didn't want to...divulge this information so he hid his face in Keegan's neck hoping the older man wouldn't feel the heat on his cheeks, but knowing Keegan, he did.

With a soft laugh, Keegan lifted Logan's face out of the crook of his neck, his fingers tracing the old scars, the dip in the clef of his chin, the furrow set in his brows from slight humiliation that was fading with each soft caress of Keegan's fingers. "You don't need to be embarrassed, you can tell me anything." Keegan whispered with gentle reassurance.

"I — uh, I've never had sex with a guy." Logan admitted quietly, he swallowed hard, unsure how Keegan would react to the confession.

"Ok." Was all Keegan said. Ok. The word held more than an acknowledgement, it carried a trust, a promise, one that eased him.

It was a quick move, but as always, a cautious one, tentative and aware, Keegan shifted a hand to the small of Logan's back and flipped their positions, mindful of the his injuries. Landing with a soft grunt Logan peered up at Keegan, his heart pounded on his bruised ribs, but the subtle pain was lost in the sheer euphoric feeling he felt being underneath Keegan's nearly bare body. Now this was more like his couch-ridden nap fantasies, Keegan being in control and on top of him, pinned down and completely at Keegan's mercy. 

"I'll make this good for you." Keegan's words breathed on his face, sweet and intoxicating, he pulled them in his lungs and felt them sink deep into his veins.

Well, he was hard now, and it was safe to say that his cock was about to become very well acquainted with Keegan's, fabric between them or not. The words were still being processed in Logan's mind, when the hell did Keegan, quiet, mysterious, and stoic Keegan become such a sexual, dominating man? Oh wait, he always had been, it was just hidden under the surface, peeking through the cracks of his steel walls, broken down only by Logan Walker. Logan was never so thankful for his dad's lessons on patience, the reward was always worth it...a heart, a man he's wanted for so long, who wanted him just as bad. Yeah..patience paid off.

Calloused fingers grazed down Logan's torso, light and heedful of their direction, evading his bandaged parts. Logan swallowed hard and nodded to the older man, his hands felt useless laying at his side, so he placed them on Keegan's hips, sweeping from the sides to his back, each one a thrill to him, all the times he's dreamed of doing this, literally dreamed, and here he was fucking touching a more than half naked Keegan, the growing hardness in his own boxers twitched at the sensation.

"I'll make this the best you've ever had." Keegan rasped out, this time his head dipped low to Logan's ear, the words striking him hard bellow. The best he's ever had? Meaning, 'I'm going to ruin you, forever and make sure no one can compare to me.' Like Logan would ever want anyone else.

A diagonal line of kisses were pressed on Logan's neck, detouring to his lips, the older man kissing him softly, the only thing rough about Keegan was his exterior, his voice, his hands, when he was on the battlefield, but every part inside, the parts reserved for Logan, were tender and affectionate, kissing Logan's closed lids before capturing his lips again. Taking it slow didn't seem like such a bad idea anymore.

Keegan's fingers moved under the hem of his shirt, lifting it up his body and over his bandaged abdomen. His lips traced a pattern down Logan's body from his lips to the bandage, his face nuzzled on the gauze, Logan could feel the warmth from him seeping through the thin wrapping. Keegan pulled the shirt off Logan, dropping it to the side of the bed, Logan took in a shaky breath, his body responding to Keegan's every move, eyes tracing the lines between his brows, the small smile on his lips.

The pace was slow and steady, Keegan made sure of that, no matter how heated and anxious Logan was below him, hips rolling up to his own, he caught them with a hand.

"Careful." Keegan cautioned him, his other hand ran over Logan's lips, grazing the full pout.

"Keegan.." Logan complained with a groan, his own hands found their way to the band of Keegan's boxers again, this time he was successful in tugging them down.

The action seemed to set off Keegan, he rutted forward on Logan, his cock slipped out from the fabric and ground down on Logan's, Keegan let out a quiet, deep groan, Logan wasn't so controlled, his loud groan startled them both, but didn't stop them from moving against each other. Keegan had to shift his body a little off of Logan to removed his boxers the rest of the way. Two seconds felt like a life-time without Keegan's weight on him, but the next moment he was there and settled back on Logan, kissing him on the mouth again, cupping the side of his face. Logan was rock hard at this point, Keegan's bare arousal hitting on him, a gasp died in the older man's throat and Logan could almost feel his brain short circuit from how delicious it sounded. A hand dug into Keegan's shoulder, the other gripped on the side of his neck, feeling the muscles tighten, Logan squirmed under Keegan, trying to wriggle his way out of his boxers, thanking the Tylenol Keegan gave him earlier for dulling the pain of moving. Keegan was the calming one, petting at his hips, slowing down the aggressive writhing, though groans were lost in the back of his throat from the very same movements.

"Take it easy, there's no rush." Keegan soothed, his voice was even lower than it usually was — lower and a little husky in a way that sent shivers down through each nerve in Logan's body. He dragged down Logan's boxers and pulled them off, pausing a moment to take in the younger man's fully exposed body. Logan's cheeks flushed at Keegan's tight jaw and more than appreciative look in his eyes, flicking up to meet his gaze, a hallow breath exhaled from his mouth, struggled to not turn into a moan.

"I need..your hands, mouth, I don't know..something, please." Logan breathed out, nervous all of a sudden, but no less turned on, exceedingly so.

There's not even time for an inhale before Keegan closes the gap between them, sealing soft, full, chapped lips with his own. Logan can make out a sigh in relief in the otherwise quiet room, but he can't tell if it's coming from him or from Keegan. It doesn't matter who it came from, they both felt it, colliding together, each sensation is shared. Logan's hands come up and roughly mess around in the older man's hair, the soft short locks slipping between his fingers, he hears Keegan take in a sharp breath at the grasp. Huh, it seemed Keegan liked things a little more rough than he'd care to admit.

An arm wraps around Logan's back, his free hand reaches blindly to his nightstand, opening the drawer and retrieving a bottle. All unbeknownst Logan, whose lost in the warm press of lips moving keenly against his own, stealing breath and burning heat right through his skin.

When they finally pull apart, Logan's out of breath and writhing again, and Keegan is staring down at him, hard exhales, controlled from years of training, and looking completely debauched from Logan's mussing. Somewhere in between the kissing and the obsessive touching, or both, Logan managed to stick Keegan's hair up in even messier angles; his lips are darkened pink and swollen, he holds the bottle firmly in a hand, his expression unreadable.

"Has it been..a while for you too?" Logan managed to ask beneath him.

"Yeah, a little while." Keegan answered gruffly, kissing the sides of Logan's face and the tip of his nose. "This is gonna be a little uncomfortable at first, but it gets better, I promise."

"Cool...I mean...alright. I trust you, Keegan." Logan cursed his awkward manner that didn't seem to disappear, no matter how turned on he was.

Keegan chuckled softly, his forehead pressed into Logan's, mirroring the gesture from yesterday - god, was it only yesterday? It's felt like this moment was endless, like they'd been caught in the heady breaths and caresses their whole lives. Their lips met again, this time Keegan's tongue slipped in between, warm and venturing Logan's mouth, his own tongue joined, frantic and feverish, setting the older man's skin aflame.

In another world completely, a world where exploring Keegan's mouth seemed to be about the best damn thing since he upgraded his L115 rifle, he's unaware that his legs are being nudged apart, that slicked fingers have dropped down between them. Unaware, that is, until Keegan breaks apart, and waits till Logan's eyes flicker open, his breath catches knowing the next move.

Logan gives his best attempt at relaxing his body, at least his lower half to save himself some discomfort, the kisses on the side of his face ease him there. Keegan's patient and thorough, on the battlefield and off, his finger works slowly into Logan, also coaxing his body, languid above, tense below, Logan's breaths are sharp and edging on pained, but Keegan knows how to play it out, how to touch him in all the right ways. Each moan and gasp that leaves his mouth, Keegan catches with his lips, adding another finger and a twist of his wrist that is just under too damn much, but not near enough, Logan slides a hand down Keegan's body and wraps his hand around Keegan's cock, his need to touch the man, to feel him all over is impossible to fight.

A simultaneous groan fills the air as both mean are left breathless by the other's actions. Logan's moving against every massage inside him, Keegan's hips rut down into Logan, his cock sliding in and out of Logan's grasp, the older man finally losing a bit of control, but he maintains enough to slip a third fingers into Logan, working them slowly and deeply, crooking them, opening him. Logan's a panting mess, he can't quit moaning and it's got them both a little worried if his perpetual noises are broadcasting to the entire base, but neither man can bring themselves to stop.

In control of himself completely, Keegan feels Logan nod with the moans, it's his cue to remove his fingers from Logan. He intended to slick himself but Logan's not letting up his firm grasp around, a grunt leaving his throat as he focuses himself on not fucking the younger man's hand again. The lube leaks from the bottle and over Logan's hand, around his hard cock, Logan drenches him to the point were he's nearly falling out his hold from the sheer amount, but he had to be careful, more than thorough.

Logan wastes no time in moving his free hand to Keegan's hip, urging it to move down and get the older man to fuck him already. He's had more than enough of the slow pace now. Keegan's slick hand grips at him too, squeezing and dragging his thumb down the side of Logan's cock.

"Keegan, I — aah, God, can you fuck me already?" Well, it wasn't the first time he'd said exact words he's had in his mind, most of the time it was a plan for attack or a comeback to his brother, not usually a desperate cry for sex from a man he's been pining over for months.

The laughter that comes this time is different than Logan's heard in the past day, it's warm and throaty as ever, but now it was edged with the same desperation the younger man felt, much to his relief, so Keegan did get a little wound up from time to time.

The typically calm under pressure man can't wait another second, he removes his hand from Logan's cock and moves it to his own, lining himself up and pushing his cock into Logan, careful and slow, his bare stomach flush to the younger man's bandaged one, his lips resuming the catching of Logan's cries, he moves easy but steady, and doesn't stop until he's buried up to the hilt in that glorious suffocating heat. For any other man, the temptation to let go and pound Logan into the mattress might be too much, but Keegan is strong-willed, giving small snaps of his hips so Logan could adjust to the stretch.

Logan struggles for air, it's an intense pleasure mixed with a dull pain, he isn't sure if he'd rather Keegan stay still inside him or relentlessly thrust into him, but he remembered Keegan's words, he wants it to be good for both of them, he wouldn't hurt him.

Keegan waits until Logan's fingers don't feel like they're crushing his shoulders from the sheer force of his grip, waits until the younger man starts writhing again and making little noises beneath him. Then he lets loose, but retains control, it's a balance on knife's edge maintaining it, but he can with all of Logan's trust held in him, that's what widens the knife point ledge to something more stable.

His thrusts are gentle and deep, every other one is hard and long, Logan's clinging to Keegan, kissing at his open mouth as Keegan lifts his hips up and hits into him with more force, reaching further as if he wanted lose himself in the younger man. Logan always pictured that Keegan would be silent in bed, but his low groans and whispers of Logan's name revealed the truth, and fuck, it was better than he could've hoped. For himself, well he was past trying to hold back his cries, especially when Keegan snapped with a twist of his hips like a cobra strike, hitting Logan unexpectedly deep inside. Nuzzling at Logan's face, Keegan does it again, harder this time, only because Logan begged him between kisses, but softer the next, their clammy skin stuck together, and Logan somehow through it all manages to get hit with an emotion, a series of images from the moment they met in No Man's Land, to the way he held his hand in the car earlier that day, secret and hidden, a moment for only the two of them in this whole fucked up world.

"I love you." Logan is helpless to stop himself from saying it, it might have been hard for Keegan to make out with the moans that mingled with it, but it looked as if he did. Keegan pulled back his head and peered down at Logan, his hips never stopped moving, only yielded slightly, his fingers brushing into the younger man's messy blonde hair, eyes bleary and yet entirely focused, a thudding heartbeat in a vein on his neck.

"I love you too.." Keegan's is lost in a groan too, but it's clear as day for Logan, clear and lucid, the four words he'd always fall back on when it felt impossible to hold on.

Logan thrust up into Keegan's movement and brought his mouth into a kiss, his time with Keegan teaching him to revile in the little motions, slow down to taste each sensation on his tongue. Logan gasps and pants, his hips bucking up again to meet Keegan's thrusts, instinctively matching his rhythm, increasing in pace and depth.

Keeping his eyes open became an impossible task, the snaps of Keegan's hips and the breathless moans of his name were too much, his lip gnawed between his teeth at the all-consuming pleasure, their foreheads pressed together again, Keegan's eyes are still open, capturing every look of ecstasy on the younger man's face as his thrusts get sloppier and more desperate, determined to hit Logan harder deep inside.

Nothing had ever felt this intense, it might have been the swell of feelings that were involved, but when Keegn lifted him up by his hips and drove into him with increased velocity, targeted snaps, he was gone. He lost count how many times the words 'fuck', 'Keegan', and a rambled jumble of incoherent noises left his mouth, but he's sure it was well over 100 and Keegan still responded to them, either with a kiss or his own muted groan.

Logan shifted his hips to pull Keegan further into him, his hand clamped down on Keegan's shoulder, it's his stitched one, but he doesn't feel any pain, not with every nerve shocked with pleasure. Keegan reached down to grip Logan's leaking cock, giving him a tight fist to fuck into, thumbing the head and spreading the pre-come that dripped from the slit.

"Keeg-" Logan can't even choke out his full name, pupils blown wide, throwing his head back and letting out a groan of pleasure that stretches into a cry as he comes. Hot, sticky fluid rushes over Keegan's hand and spreads on Logan's belly, the younger man's eyes actually seem to roll back for a moment as though he simply can't handle the pleasure of his orgasm, and he clamps a hand tightly over Keegan's free one, as gripping as all the times the sniper helped his to his feet, it's a possessive hold and protective, Keegan brought it up to his heart and Logan could feel the pounding.

People talk about seeing a flash of white when you come or stars, all Logan saw was Keegan's eyes, that shock of electric blue was the brightest thing in his life. His body was raw and spent from his orgasm, but Keegan was just on the edge of falling over, his hand still firmly wrapped around Logan as he drove into the younger man, an expression on his face that Logan had never seen before, ecstasy shown through, his mouth open to release the deep pants of breath, Logan leaned up and returned the favor, catching the moans that Keegan was holding back before, louder than they had been the whole night.

Only a man like Keegan could be graceful when he comes, if graceful had the definition of a strained neck, tendons prominent on the side, a perfect snap of hips as he spilled inside Logan, their hands still clasped together, and loud groan that held Logan's name somewhere in the back of his throat. It was fucking poetic to Logan, and he'd never been a fan of that stuff, but this witnessing this made him a believer of many things, anything.

Their sweaty foreheads nudged together and they were kissing, tamer than before due to their spent bodies, a raw and fading pleasure coursing through them both. Breathing hard, Keegan slipped out of him and reached for something to clean up, but Logan didn't notice, he was seeing those stars again, Keegan's eyes twinkling at him over his closed lids, a well fucked smile on his lips, all through Keegan wiping them both off and twisting the switch on the bedside lamp, leaving them in the darkness. Taking care like he always did, Keegan pulled the blanket over Logan and settled himself under it too.

"Um...I think it's safe to say that was the best I've ever had or will have. Fuck, I don't want anyone that's not you." Logan whispered as Keegan wrapped his arms around Logan from behind.

"You have me, you always will." Keegan told him, pressing his lips to a new scar he found just before the light went out.

"Don't make me promises you can't keep, Keegie..I..mean it." Logan breathed out, holding Keegan's hands tightly.

"I never make promises, kid...only for you."

Logan swallowed thickly and nodded, it was just what he needed to hear, and all he needed to feel was Keegan's head tucked behind his, lips on his neck, warm breath hitting him, and arms, strong like his own, holding him like he was an anchor, like he was a life raft on a rocky sea. Not that Logan was planning on hitting the ocean again any time soon.

* * *

It's a volting jump this time, the feeling that wakes Keegan up from otherwise peaceful sleep, but it's not nearly as bad like before because Logan's there, pressed on his chest. He's there. And he's fine. He tells himself that. He cranes his head up over the sleeping, messy blonde haired head in front of him and reads the clock. 7:02 am. Shit. If he didn't get up now and play things off like they were normal, he'd have an awkward position to explain. He didn't even have the time to bathe in the morning after glory or take in Logan's adorably sexy sleeping form, mumbling incoherent things every once in a while, and he's honestly surprised, and a little elated, about how many times he hears his own name, it's nothing about sharks this time, only a breathy sigh, his lips twitching up or his hips writhing back..he has a good idea what that one is about. His gaze moves from the memorizing show on Logan's face to the bandage on his hand curled around his own. In the illuminated room Keegan can see peeks of blood through the materiel.

Slowly, Keegan slides out from behind Logan, but he wasn't expecting Logan to be like sinking sand, pulling him in tighter the more he moved. He'd have to make this quick, he yanked his arms free from Logan as gently and fast as he could, smiling when he heard a whine. He walks to his dresser and pulls out the basic Ghosts attire, the grey pants, the darker grey shirt that will get covered with another grey shirt just before their mission tonight. Grey on grey on grey. One of the few things in his life not grey was the man in his bed, whose talking seemed to increase with him not laid behind him, he stole a quick look at Logan as he tied his boots.

"mmm'I'm getting down, Keegie..." Logan mumbled in his sleep, turning over and winding his arms around Keegan's pillow. The smile on his face grew at the nickname, it was...different. No one ever gave him a nickname before, probably because he'd never gotten close enough with someone to earn one. He likes the sound of it coming from Logan's mouth in a smoky, silvery voice.

Before he leaves the room, he leans over the bed and kisses Logan on his forehead, cheek, and mouth, satisfied with the smile that shows up on Logan afterward. Everyone on the base is awake, and that's a little troubling, he hoped no one went to Logan's room to check on him. Riley runs down the hall hearing his foot falls on the linoleum floor and greets him by waging his tail excitedly and nudging his head into Keegan's hand.

"Hey, Riley. Thanks for watching over Logan for me yesterday..don't worry, I took care of him last night..and..he took care of me too.." Keegan said, starting to feel a little ridiculous saying suggestive things to a dog, but Riley didn't care, just licked his face once and left, trotting down the hall and turning the corner, most likely looking for Logan. Keegan would have stopped him, but Logan needed to get up anyways, before someone found him naked in his bed. No smooth words could brush it off like it was normal, but he wanted it to be normal, a routine, Logan naked in his bed every morning. It could be.

In the small room off the break room that Logan and him spent so much time in, Keegan searched through the cabinets for a clean gauze, humming quietly to himself in the empty room, too blissed out to realize that humming first thing in the morning, or ever, was something he'd never done before, but he shrugged it off, figuring it had to do with last night and that damn kid...just thinking of it made a smile peek on his lips.

There was a slight creak on the floor as someone entered the room, Keegan turned his head and saw Merrick walk over to the counter and lean on it with his arms crossed.

"Merrick, hey." Keegan greeted the other man with a nod and continued his search.

"You and Logan?" Merrick said.

That was enough to make him falter in his raiding, but he kept his cool and went back to it like the three words didn't send him into a mini panic.

"That's an odd greeting...What about me and Logan?" Keegan asked slowly.

"You two are together..." Merrick stated simply, the easy words coming from a carefully held expression on his face.

So much for maintaining his cool, Keegan abandoned his search and faced Merrick, there was no use in denying it. If Merrick knew, then he would have no luck in convincing him otherwise. "How did - did you hear us last night?" Keegan moved closer.

"Keegan, I know you, I don't need to hear anything, thanks for that information by the way. But it's all over your face, and the way you two are acting around each other, mirroring the other's movements, the glances, the smiles, it's all obvious. I wondered before..but I knew yesterday."

"I...fuck." Keegan leaned on the counter across from his friend, his eyes wide and worried.

"You don't have to explain anything, Keegan, but are you sure you want to do this again? After..?" Merrick asked carefully.

"I'm sure. I care about Logan. I..love him." It felt like a long held breath being released to say the words to someone else, especially to the one man other than Logan he considered to be a best friend.

"Also obvious. Ok then, when is Elias going to find out? Hesh?"

"We haven't thought that far ahead. Me and him...it's all new."

Merrick laughed, "Well, you might want to think about it carefully, Elias might not care much though, might be happy Logan is happy. Even if it is with someone he's known for well over 15 years. Hesh, I don't know what goes on in that kid's head, but not sure he'd like being kept in the dark."

"Thanks, Merrick..." Keegan muttered dryly, crossing his arms to match the other man, tapping a finger on his forearm.

"Ah, it doesn't matter. You're both adults, but you're also soldiers, Ghosts...Keegan nothing can come between a mission, not even — "

"Don't give me that tired old manual bullshit, Merrick. You know I keep it together, no matter what."

"You do, but this is different, you're with him now and there's no turning back. Just...make sure you keep it together, for the Ghosts, for him, for you." Merrick said, his voice was soft and edged with a concern not heard by many people before.

Keegan took his words to heart, most people saw Merrick as cold and unfeeling, but he cared, a whole hell of a lot more than he'd admit, but Keegan had seen it before and he was seeing it again. "I will."

"Alright, we're good then." Merrick changed back to his serious manner, though there was a small, barely there smile on his mouth. "Gauze is in the cabinet on the far left." He informed Keegan and left.

* * *

A wake up call from a person was generally annoying and put you in a bad mood, like when Hesh would hit him with pillows till he moved when they were kids, or his dad saying his name a million times, the only words convincing him to get up were 'waffles' and 'new hiking trail', that one didn't leave him _as_ peeved, but it still left him less than overjoyed at waking up. But it was impossible, for Logan at least, to not be happy woken up by his dog jumping on the bed and licking all over his face, that would have been enough to make his morning, but the sight of Keegan in the doorway, closing it and making his way to the foot of the bed, smiling at him warmly. Now that was a wake up call.

"Morning..." Logan said, feeling a heat prickling on his skin, not just from the sun peeking through the blinds, as he remembered their night together. And there Riley sat, in Keegan's spot, unaware of the entire evening.

"Hey, kid." Keegan walked over to the bed, a shirt, boxers, and some medical supplies in his hands as he sat down next to Logan, giving him a slow, meaningful kiss, Logan lifted a hand and rested it on the back of Keegan's head, his fingers feeling about in the dark locks.

Keegan pulled away and rested his forehead on Logan's, pausing to collect his thoughts, "Here. Might want to put this on in case someone walks in, even though it pains me to ask you to cover up." Keegan said with a smirk.

"Oh it does?"

"Completely painful..." It wasn't a joke, but the smirk was still there, and his eyes scanned across Logan's bare body.

"Sorry." Logan said mock-apologetically and took the boxers, he managed to slip them on under the covers and hopped off the bed, his ribs not bugging him all that much today, must've had to do with all the sleep he got, gave his wounds the time needed to heal.

"Can I...see?" Keegan asked, standing from the bed and meeting Logan, gesturing to the wrapping around his torso.

"Yeah, go ahead, but trust me, it looks worse than it feels...today at least."

Keegan nodded and removed the metal clipping, unwrapping the bandage from Logan's torso layer by layer and reviling the bruise...so it still looked pretty bad, the older man flinched when he saw it, unusual for the stoic soldier who definitely had seen worse injuries, but then again, when it came to Logan it was all there on the table, no tricks to hide how he felt.

"Shit." Keegan touched the slightly less angry purple colored bruising and flattened his palm on it — his hand nearly covered the entire length, and the warmth felt good.

"Worse than it looks, Keegie." Logan reminded him.

"OK...I'll take your word for that."

In an unexpected move, Keegan bent down and kissed the large bruise right in the center where it was darkest, then on Logan's lips, a hand came up and cupped the side of the younger man's face.

Logan takes Keegan's other hand and says, as earnestly as he's ever said anything in his life, "Remember how you said you were no good at 'this' kind of stuff? Um, that was the biggest load of crap ever, because you are. Holy shit you are...you're amazing." Logan was on the cusp of a moan just from thinking about last night and every touch that was left on his skin from the day they met to this very moment. Logan never claimed to be an expert with charming words, but maybe his assurance was romantic to Keegan because it was entirely a 'Logan' thing to say, judging by the look on Keegan's face, softened, brows raised just enough to convey a look of gentle awe, it seemed what Logan said was pretty significant to him.

"Is there time for...?" Logan asked hopefully, his body getting wound up fro the look and touches, he pleased with another kiss.

"I wish," Keegan sighed, leaning into another kiss, keeping it chaste, and begrudgingly pulling away."but..we have to get dressed, eat, mission de-brief, then we're off. The usual." He mumbled.

"Dammit." Logan sighed too and pulled the matching grey shirt over his head.

"Before we head out there, I need to change that bandage — and tell you something."

"Huh, that, uh...that doesn't sound good."

"It's worse than it sounds, trust me." Keegan said, using Logan's own words on him.

"Ok, reeling in the worry then." Logan huffed out a laugh.

Keegan sat Logan on the bed and took Logan's wounded hand his, removing the old bandage and looking up to him. "It's Merrick. He knows."

Logan's hand almost flew out of Keegan's hold, but he stopped himself, cooled down by the calm vibes Keegan was emitting. "And...?"

"And he doesn't care. Just wants us to keep it off the battlefield."

"So what? Leave our feelings inside the transport and pick them up on exfil?" Logan scoffed a laughed, Keegan tossed the dirty gauze to the trash and winded the clean one under and over Logan's wrist. "I can't shut how I feel on and off. No matter how much Hesh or dad tried to drill that in my head."

"Me too. I think we should keep this between us..and Merrick, for now." Keegan said, securing the bandage on Logan.

"Mhm, yeah...but we're going to tell everyone eventually?" Logan asked and worried at his bottom lip.

"Eventually...just not yet." Keegan toyed with Logan's fingers on the mattress next to him.

"I get that, but..we _are_ going to tell them, right, Keegie? I can't hide this forever..and I don't think I want to." Logan confessed with a small smile.

"I feel the same, I do." Keegan paused and lifted Logan's hand, kissing his knuckle. "But this all might be hard for the rest of them to take. We're Ghosts Logan, we have our duties." Right after he said them, Keegan realized his words were similar to Merrick's, identical, and he hated when that shit got thrown at him.

"I know my 'duties'..but it's different for me, I can't keep us hidden from my family for too long, they can read me like a book, dad especially, fuck...hope he doesn't use that radar of his to go looking for me one night we're in here together and see something..."

"A radar?" Keegan gave Logan a baffled look.

"Not a literal one, its this - I don't know 'dad sense', after my mom..died..it was something that he instilled in himself I guess, keep a close eye on us, make sure we didn't get hurt."

Keegan swallowed hard and looked off to the side, he may have been a Ghost, but there was something certainly haunting his eyes, his mind. "We both lost someone that day." Keegan's voice was controlled, like it was something he practiced over the years. The confession shocked Logan.

"Both lost someone, what? When?"

"I'm sure Elias has told you the story of the Federation attack, 500 men against us? Your mom was there — you didn't know?" Keegan blinked back the surprise.

Logan shook his head slowly, brows pinching together. "She died..there? That day? How?" Logan was aware that his mom was killed in action, but he never knew that it was with his dad, that they were on the same mission together, not just any mission either, the mission that made his father a Ghost.

"Fuck...I don't know if I should be telling you this, there's probably a reason he didn't. But I can guess why it was.." Keegan paused, his fingers twined with Logan's. "She died saving your dad. He was surrounded, there were at least six Feds on him, talking about how they wanted take him off, torture him, but your mom was there, she was silent, deadly, it was the fastest 5 head shot I'd ever seen, but she wasn't expecting...the seventh Fed behind her, she was - " Keegan struggled to get the words out, his fingers squeezed tighter around Logan.

"Stabbed..in the back." Logan finished for him in a whisper, he'd never forget the day the military officers told Hesh and him what happened, the details, he was just a kid, but he needed to know.

"Yes, Elias...held her while she passed. Merrick, Ajax, Kick, and me covered them while they, you know."

"She wasn't alone then? Dad was there? Her friends were there?" Logan asked, void of breath.

"She wasn't alone." Keegan emphasized, his eyes boring into Logan's.

"I always thought — they made it seem like she died all alone, with no one who loved her around, but she had dad..she had you guys.." Logan was upset that his father never told him this, why wouldn't he? Walkers didn't keep secrets. But that was a load of crap, because here he sat on the edge of Keegan's bed, holding his hand, a secret of his own.

"Look, kid, I already told you too much, this wasn't mine to tell." Keegan anxiously rubbed at the back of his neck with his free hand.

"That's the thing, Keegan, it's been this long, I don't think he would have told me..ever." Logan grumbled.

"You can't hold it against your dad, I bet he wanted to tell you, but it's not an easy thing to tell anyone, let alone your kids."

"I'm not mad at him, I'm just..shocked, I guess. But knowing she wasn't alone, that makes me..more at peace with it."

Keegan nodded softly and wrapped his arms around Logan, pressing a kiss on the side of his mouth.

"But you said...you _both_ lost someone that day?" Logan asked carefully, his voice cracking.

Keegan stiffened for a moment, but didn't move away, didn't loosen his grip. If anything, he wound himself around the younger man tighter, still mindful of his wounds.

"We weren't together long, me and him..but I was young, crazy for him, we knew the risks, we knew the score, the odds were against us. I didn't see him die, we  but I found him, took his dog tags, didn't let go of those things for a while, shit..I did though, put them to rest years ago, put him to rest." Keegan stopped there, there was something underlying in his words, another confession stuck in the back of his throat, but it stayed in place.

Another thing Elias had taught Logan, patience, he may have meant it for missions, for taking down an enemy, but he's sure it could be applied here as well, in a relationship with a man as mysterious and quiet as Keegan. He knew that the older man trusted him, maybe more than anyone else, so he would tell him when he was good and ready.

"I'm sorry..." Logan said lamely, wishing he had a better way with words, but that was never his specialty.

"It's ok, kid. You're the first person I've talked about it with. I tried to forget about it, push it out of my head, but it feels...good to have someone to talk to."

"You can tell me anything...anything." Logan assured him, leaning his head back and kissing the side of Keegan's jaw. He remembered yesterday morning and the muttering Keegan was doing in his sleep, when he said there was 'feeling' that was bothering him.

"I know. And I will. Just give me some time."

Well, that was a much needed step forward. It was reassuring to know that, someday, the parts of Keegan that were a mystery wouldn't always remain that. The list was growing smaller everyday. "Of course...take as long as you need. I'll always be here."

"Thank you." Keegan leaned over and kissed him on the lips.

Logan's eyelids fluttered a bit as the older man pulled away. "For what?"

"For saying that...I..needed to hear it." There, right in those words laid what he was hiding, Logan could pinpoint it now, but Keegan looked less tense after Logan made his promise.

"Huh, wow, I can say the right thing sometimes." Logan said, more to himself than to Keegan, the words sounding like a question.

"You do that more than you think." Keegan murmured with a faint smile, his hand coming up to rest on the side of Logan's neck.

Logan moved forward with the full intention of throwing himself on Keegan but there was a knock on the door, three raps and a tap. Merrick. It was time to go.

* * *

_'Focus, Logan, Focus.'_

The phrase kept repeating in the youngest Ghosts head. It was pouring down rain, but the mission was simple. Infiltrate the Federation's weapon factory and find out what they were up to. Logan's trained for this sort of thing his entire life, the fire fights, the brutal head-front assaults. Being a Ghost. It's what Elias had been training him for since the day he turned 18, the day he vowed to be more than just a man or a man with a weapon, but become a weapon himself. Training for that was easy in contrast to this, crouched down in the rain with Merrick, who was casting unreadable looks at Logan, he could only assume they were bad.

Logan cleared his throat in the storming night, his gear was heavy, but the weight of knowing Keegan was off without him right now laid more heavily in his mind. He had to play it off like it was no big deal, it wasn't really, he could convince himself. But Merrick was like a fucking telepath, as if he knew exactly what was going on in Logan's head and was eyeing him closer than before because of it.

"He's fine." Merrick's voice was muffled under his mask, his eyes clear despite the shadowed night.

"Of course he is, he's _Keegan_." Logan mumbled and stood up to lean on a tree, flipping the Honey Badger around in his hands, distracting his hands and eyes from Merrick.

Hard to do when the older man walked over and stood next to him, free from the rain under the cover of the limbs. "I'm just gonna come out and say it, I gave the same speech to Keegan, but still, you need to keep your head on straight when we're out here. It's gonna be harder for him than it is for you though." Merrick said with a stern expression, but a trace of concern in his eyes.

"I'm keeping it together, Merrick. I didn't even say anything." Logan said with a shrug, and here he thought he was a good bullshiter. "Harder for him...because of Operation Sand Viper?" Logan hesitated, staring from his rifle to the other man.

"Partly, but Keegan's the type to keep people away, push them, if necessarily. But when he let's someone in, he's gonna hold them close. Especially after..that mission. I take it he told you what happened." Merrick moved and leaned on the tree next to Logan.

"Mmm, he did. He lost someone."

Merrick nodded."It messed him up for a long time. He never fully recovered."

"He seems ok now. I mean, he is, right? You knew him longer than me." Logan felt a little uneasy from Merrick's words.

"But you know him better." Merrick said with a meaningful look. "He'll never be the same as he was before that day, none of us are. But he is better. Thanks to time, and you, of course."

Logan bit back the smile, keeping his expression neutral, to the best of his abilities.

Merrick waved his hand in the air. "So, like I said, he'll be fine, because Keegan's not gonna let anyone take him away from you." Merrick's tone was joking, but serious. A hard line to walk, but not for Merrick.

"Ok...but they were supposed to check in 10 minutes ago and —" Logan started.

"Alright, we're in position. Waiting for your go." Hesh's voice called over the radio.

"Copy that. Hold there, Logan and me will take down the targets dead ahead and regroup." Merrick responded.

Logan shifted on his feet, anxious to get moving.

"Kid — Logan you left your L115 in the chopper." Keegan's voice rasped over the static.

Logan froze in his moving, a sigh of relief exhaled hearing Keegan speak. "Dammit, I knew I forgot something." He said on the exhale.

An audible deep chuckle was heard on the other end, the way it effected Logan was hidden by the night sky. "It's waiting for you." The channel was cut then, a necessity to remain in stealth. His gun was waiting for him. And so was Keegan.

"See. Fine." Merrick stated. Logan could literally feel the smirk on his mouth.

"Yeah, yeah. Let's go, _Captain_." Logan shoved off the tree.

Merrick's laughed quietly in response.

His laughter, on the other hand, didn't cause quite the same reaction.

 

They regrouped with Keegan, Hesh, and Kick a couple minutes later, Logan may have jogged faster than Merrick to meet up with them. When Keegan's half-masked face came into view he made his way next to him, evading Hesh who rolled on the ground before standing. Show off.

Logan couldn't be sure from the distance, but it looked like Keegan was smiling as he closed the distance, the closer he got, the more he saw it in the older man's eyes. Logan stood solidly next to Keegan, giving him a firm nod. Keegan pulled Logan's sniper rifle from his back and held it out for him to take.

"Thanks for taking care of it." Logan said softly, putting the rifle on his own back. Damn, he wanted to kiss him right now. _'Focus'._ His dad's voice rang in his head again.

"Of course, kid. No problem." Keegan winked at Logan and pulled his own rifle out.

Logan switched off his radio and leaned in close to Keegan's face. "If we weren't on a high risk mission and my brother wasn't 10 feet away from me, I'd kiss you right now."

"That it? After I protected your favorite gun?" Keegan huddled closer.

"Keegan, are you making sexual advances?" Logan was a little blown away by Keegan's forwardness, which might have come across as mild for most people, but for Keegan, this was dirty talk.

Keegan made a deep noise in the back of his throat, akin to a hum. "Just wait till we're back in our room, Walker."

All Logan did was groan. Loudly. Hesh's, Kick's, and Merrick's heads snapped over to the two of them. Hesh and Kick looked concerned. Merrick looked blank, like he too was about to groan, for an entirely different reason.

"It's just — my ribs?" Logan lied, playing it up by holding them with a hand and wincing slighly.

Merrick shook his head in disbelief, rolling his eyes at him and shooting a look to Keegan.

Dammit.

* * *

The base appeared to be empty, much to Logan's grief, for as soon as they returned, Keegan was pulled off by Elias, and now he hadn't seen the man in hours. There was time to think about other matters, the information they learned at the factory was...unsettling, to say the least. The Feds were up to something, and it sure as hell wasn't good. That, and the news he received a few days back was still weighing heavy on his mind. Finding out what really happened to his mother was a shock. To his knowledge, his father and mother never actively served or worked on missions together, but to discover that they had, and during a mission that changed everything..he couldn't believe it. He wanted to go to his dad, ask him why he never told them, but what was the point? It was years ago and obviously his father wanted to bury it, forget it. Maybe he should too, think on the present, the future.

The future. When you enter a relationship with someone, you're supposed to feel like the future is bright, that life is only going to get better and better each day. But with the Feds, Rorke, and this new weapon they've constructed...it all seemed like a dark cloud hung over, a looming presence...a...feeling. Was that what Keegan had been talking about before? Was this the feeling he was getting? That everything they had, their friends had, their families, whatever fragments were left after ODIN, was going to be lost too?

Logan paced in the locker room, a towel hung loose on his hips from the frantic walking, his mind was racing a million miles a minute, wet from a shower he'd taken to get his mind off things. Yeah, sure. It only made him think more, and none of his thoughts were pleasant, dark and laced with an impending doom. Earlier, he tried playing fetch with Riley on the small side yard and that did no good either, for when he peeked over the edge of the wall, he saw the wake of destruction from 10 years ago, and how that could all happen again, worse this time, much worse. Even if they leveled that factory, whose to say there isn't more?

Now Logan stood in front of the mirror in the locker room, poking lightly at the bruise on his torso. The mission wasn't that bad, it's weird to think that Hell Weeks still seemed harder than being a Ghost, but maybe that's what all that training was for, to make anything seem easy..at least easier. His ribs didn't hurt anymore, even after the mission, but they still looked like hell. Logan wondered if the lack of pain was in his subconscious, that part of him that always fought through the pain and pushed it out of his mind, like in the story his dad told Keegan.

 _Keegan_.

It'd been two full nights since their night together. Getting to and from Brazil and the mission itself made the time fly by, but now it seemed like years since they touched, talked privately, kissed. Merrick was the only one who knew, and even with knowing about their relationship, he'd surely frown upon them holding each other in the pave low, or stealing a kiss. Their knees touching on the way back wasn't enough, grazing hands while passing each other full mags during combat wasn't enough, and now Logan felt touch starved, it hit him suddenly and forcefully. At least they had one more night of comfort before they were thrown, not unwillingly, back into the fight. One night.

......................

Nearly silent footfalls echoing off the shower room walls were his cue, he was ready now. He'd see how well executed his plan was. Hopefully his completely out-of-context use of his dad's training could be applied here as well. Not that his old man would ever find out if it was successful or not. Never.

He counted the steps in his head, almost there...almost. He held his breath and then turned the corner, running directly into Keegan, he angled the "accidental" collision so that his ribs were protected from Keegan hitting them. The older man's hands instinctively did the same, protecting Logan from any sort of pain, to the best of his abilities under a surprise 'attack'.

"Shit, sorry, Keegan!" Logan stammered, bracing his hands on Keegan's biceps, squeezing around the muscle.

Keegan's eyes were a widened from the shock of it all, "Don't worry about, kid...you ok?" 

"I meant..I'm sorry I missed." Ok, so maybe that line sounded better in his mind.

Logan wrapped his arms around Keegan's body and yanked him close, the older man's clothed body roughly rubbing on his own. Keegan hadn't fully taken in the fact that Logan was standing only in a towel till now, his eyes trailing down from Logan's face to the top of the towel, somehow remaining in place, lowly hung on his hips, the cut of his hip bones visible, Keegan's gaze lingered there the longest, biting at his lower lip. Logan was working him, just as planned. He moves forward then, his lips on the other man's right in there in the locker room's blindingly bright lighting, kissing him hard, needily. Keegan responds at once, the postponed touches from the past two days poured into the kiss. It's exciting, dangerous. Logan nips lightly on Keegan's bottom lip, taking over his previous biting, their noses nudge together.

Something clicks in Keegan's mind, a sense of awareness.

Keegan breaks away from the kiss, his eyes dropping down to Logan's reddened lips, wet now like his body, he swallows hard, "Logan - shit what are you doing?" Keegan groaned out when Logan's trail of kisses lead down the side of his neck, focusing on a pulse point, thudded strong and racing, the older sergeant was experienced with keeping himself calm and relaxed no matter the situation, even in the event that Logan Walker decides to pounce on him in the locker room and suck on his neck, but he couldn't stay composed forever. "Kid...we can't do this here." He panted, his eyes desperately telling a different story.

Logan ran his tongue over Keegan's adam's apple as he swallowed hard again, it bobbed over his tongue, the rough scratch of the other man's stubble grazing his tongue, he bit down again over the sides, firm kisses between each one, a pattern of sorts, planning to keep heading up till they were face to face again.

"Why the hell not?" Logan whined as Keegan pulled him away from kissing his neck and held him there, a good six inches of distance between them now, Logan's half-lidded eyes glazed over, shooting a glare.

"Because your brother, father, or hell, even Merrick, could walk in on us at any second. I don't think that's how you want them to find out that we're together. Is it?" Keegan pleaded to him, his attempts were getting weaker.

"Merrick already knows. And I don't really give a damn right now."

"Fuck, Logan..." Keegan couldn't get another word out as Logan shoved him back into the alcove of the lockers and the wall, there was enough space for the two of them and it was hidden, that was good enough. Logan restarted his assault on the man's neck, drawing out low moans from the older man's mouth.

"Do you want me to stop, Keegan?" Logan asked after a firm swipe of his tongue over Keegan's neck, his hands digging into the fabric of his fatigues.

"No." Keegan groaned, his hands moving up Logan's body and into his towel, that's when he found a bottle shoved in the space. "What is — did you know this was gonna happen?" He asked, pulling out the bottle of lube from Logan's towel, his expression a cross of arousal and astonishment.

"Yeah, pretty much. I just snuck off to our room about 5 minutes ago and got that," Logan nodded to the bottle in Keegan's hand, his other was rubbing at Logan's hip, dangerously low to his ass. "Then I stealthed back here and waited." Logan leaned up and kissed Keegan soundly on the lips.

"You're sneaky..." Keegan murmured on his lips, his breath fanning on Logan's face.

Logan shrugged, "I recall you doing the same to see me in the hospital. I'm a Ghost and Walker. Sneaky is in my genes..."

"I like it..." Keegan kept the bottle in his hands and drew Logan into another kiss.

God, yes. Logan had his doubts if Keegan would go through with this in such a risky area, but it was that thrill that set him off, them both off. If danger didn't excite you a little bit, then you were probably in the wrong line of work.

Keegan's not fighting it anymore, he leans over and puts the lube on the bench so his hands are free to run up Logan's back, winding around to his front, taking either side of his neck in his hands and pulling him back into a kiss, sucking at Logan's bottom lip leaving Logan his top. Logan needs this, even if it's quick and rough, his body is burning and only more fire can put it out, the flames licking at his skin — or is it Keegan? Who tore away from his mouth and began licking at his chest slowly, working his way around in circles, down to his bruised stomach, his muscles contract in his abdomen as Keegan kisses around the edge of the wounded flesh, his hot breath fanning a different flame altogether.

A moan rises from Logan's throat as Keeagan strays lower, skimming the hem of Logan's towel with a tempting cut across. Logan presses back into a locker, his hips easing forward. Keegan sinks to his knees, his hands on the top of the towel, gazing up at Logan, a small smirk on his face. Something about the fact that Keegan is still fully dressed in his mission fatigues, down on his knees in front of him is just about the searingly hottest thing Logan has ever seen. He's loud, he knows that, so he bites the back of his knuckle to keep the groan at the sight quiet, his other hand moving to the top of Keegan's head, threading the short, dark locks through his fingers, his heart pounding. Keegan drags the towel off of Logan's body and it falls to the floor, Logan takes a breath while he can, for the next moment later, Keegan grips a hand around his half-hard cock and licks down the side, his hips roll into the motion of their own accord, Keegan catches them with a hand as he leaves suction kisses over his length.

"Oh, fuck..." Logan tries to bite back the moan, but it's too late, the sound is already echoed off the walls. He peeks down at Keegan finding him peering up at Logan, but he doesn't look worried about the loud cry, he looks determined, like he wants to make Logan do it again and again. Keegan's tongue swirls around all the way to the top of his cock, purposely avoiding the head, his hand tight around the base. Logan keeps himself from rubbing his cock over Keegan's jaw, though he wonders how the stubble on Keegan's skin would feel prickling on him, he rests his head back on the tile. Keegan's not out to make him come from this, only to bring him to an exact point, precise, he probably has it all planned out. And Logan thought he was the sneaky one.

Logan hears a quiet noise and intake of breath, he peers down again, just in time for Keegan to part his lips and slip Logan's cock inside his mouth, clear to the back of his throat, hallowing his cheeks and pulling back, releasing him and dipping his tongue into the slit, his fingers fondling lower, using his tongue and fingers in tandem, a lethal combination, Logan's moans are off the charts in their sheer number, the volume is maintained with his knuckle, but it's getting painful. Keegan leaves sloppy licks over his cock, the edge of his teeth ghosting his length, then sucks him down again, Logan pulsing and growing inside his mouth.

A loud cry of protest escapes Logan's throat as Keegan stops all the attention to his cock, now fully erect to his stomach, he adds one final firm lick up the length and stands, kissing at the side of Logan's jaw. Logan predicted this, but he couldn't find himself being too upset, not when Keegan's hands move to his ass and pull him close, spreading the younger man and simultaneously rutting his body over Logan's length, beads of white dripping from the top, tempting Keegan to wrap his hand over the head again spreading it over his cock. Logan lets out a whimper and thrusts into Keegan's hand, bumping his hip into Keegan's growing arousal, the older man moans, either from touching Logan or the grinding moves, Logan has a feeling it's both.

The moan turns to a gasp as one of Logan's hands finds a way down the front of Keegan's pants, gently rolling him through the fabric, running his fingers back up and popping the button of his pants, tugging the scratching fabric down Keegan's body. Logan hums at the sight of Keegan's hard cock outlined in his boxers, his fingers brushed over the hollow of Keegan's hip then down, clamping his hard length through the fabric of his boxers. Keegan's groan is lost in his throat, Logan seizes the moment and raises forward, looking for some friction, but Keegan's other hand is strong and steady on his hip.

"God, I need to see you..." Logan breathes out, his fingers working over the buttons on Keegan's tactical shirt, stained with dirt and gunpowder, he pulls it off Keegan's body and lets it fall from his hands in favor of feeling his way on Keegan's body.

"Fuck you're so hot." Logan's voice is all but a whine as leans in, kissing at Keegan's chest and the dips of scars he's still learning, his licks are eager and messy, Keegan's skin tastes like sweat and he moans with each drag of Logan's tongue, each soft press of lips on a scar, his fingers caressing the side of the younger man's face. Keegan pulls Logan's face up and pressing his mouth to Logan's wet and hard kisses, the sounds of their breathing is catching and gasping. Keegan leans down his head places a trio of kisses to Logan's chest, his lips leave an invisible frame around Logan's heart, pounding and swelled with arousal and affection.

In a swift move, Keegan spins him around and pushes him into the wall, gently of course, but rough enough for Logan's cock to twitch, his hand comes up and slams on the wall, ready for anything, for it all. Keegan kisses across his shoulder blades, in between, and down his spine, his tongue tracing the dips of muscles, Logan's skin heated and flushed, he rests his forehead on his arm, Keegan's rough hands slowly moving across his fully exposed body.

Then, they're gone, for a dreaded moment while Keegan retrieves the lube again, opening it and pouring it down Logan's ass, the liquid is warmer than he was expecting and it feels good sliding down, his back arches as Keegan's fingers rub the lube around his entrance. Logan flushes and gasps as the loud and obscene noises reverberate in the quiet alcove.

Keegan comes up behind him whispers in his ear, "You might want keep it down, kid, anyone could walk in..."

It's like a challenge, how much can Logan take before he alerts the whole base to their fucking? At this rate, he's bound to fail. And Logan hates losing, but he couldn't think of a better defeat than this.

"Relax, I've got you.." Keegan's husky voice is there again, followed by him nibbling on his ear lobe, he can hear Keegan's quickened breaths and he does what Keegan says, following commands coming natural to him, and this is the kind he'd like to hear all the time. He relaxes enough for two fingers to slip inside of him, a breathy gasp falls from his mouth, Keegan's other hand is massaging his ass, pulling him back and open on his fingers.

"Fuck, fuck, fuck" Logan stammers out, his body trembling at the spark of pleasure, the discomfort nonexistent and lost in the push and pull of Keegan's fingers. The noises are even more lewd, the atmosphere adding to the feelings, it leaves him with a light-head and a fumbling hand on the wall. Keegan slips in a third finger, twisting the three digits in pumping motions, as he presses back against Keegan for even more stimulation, his fingers not satisfying enough, not reaching deep enough. "Keegan, please I need — fuck I need more." Logan's not above begging, not with this, it's the only way he gets exactly what he wants.

A fourth finger pushes in, it's better, but still not enough, Keegan spreads his fingers and pulls Logan by the hip and back harder on them, Logan nearly begs Keegan to keep going. but he slips his fingers out slowly, Logan's hips moving back with them involuntarily. "I'll give you more." Keegan's voice rasps in his ear again.

"Fuck yes..." Logan looks over his shoulder and sees Keegan's boxers are down, the lube is slipping down the sides of his cock, it glistens in the florescent lighting, throbbing, hard, and a flushed a light shade of red on the head, Logan bites his lip in anticipation, Keegan's eyes meet his gaze and holds the contact the entire time he lubes himself up. Logan gets off on the grunts from the back of Keegan's throat, the way his brows pull down in discipline, a concentration to not fuck him in his own closed fist, his jaw clenched and his eyes are heady and hooded, never leaving Logan's.

"Remember, anyone can here us." Keegan said again, easing Logan further into the wall of the alcove.

"I don't care, please Keegan just —"

Keegan's slicked cock ruts between his crack, both men groaning at the feeling. Keegan pulls Logan into him by the hip, the other gripped at the base of his own cock, rubbing himself and teasingly slipping the head of his cock into Logan drawling out a particularly exaggerated groan from the younger man. With a hand still firmly on Logan's hip, he lets go of his own cock with the other and snaps his hips forward, easily sinking into Logan.

"God, aaah, shit.." Logan cries out as Keegan buries himself till he's all in to the base of his cock, his arm winds around Logan's neck and a hand presses over his mouth, silencing the loud moans with his palm.

Keegan lifts his head up kissing up his neck, sweet and soft, gentle nibbles on his jaw as he whispers in Logan's ear, "Does this make you uncomfortable? Do you want me to pull away?" His voice is rough and concerned, trembling slightly due to holding himself back from fucking into Logan.

Logan shakes his head instantly, Keegan's palm suppressing his loud cries is not only necessary, but hot and dominating, Logan breathes harder through his nose and pushes back on Keegan, urging him to move.

Keegan starts with gentle snaps of his hips, Logan's back arches in pleasure, causing Keegan to gasp as Logan's muscles clenched around the cock deep inside of him. Logan didn't want it slow, he needed a quick, hard fuck, his hip nearly flew out of Keegan's hold as he fucked himself on the older man's cock, grateful for Keegan's palm over his mouth, stifling his increasing moans. Keegan got the point and set a quick and steady pace, the sound of their flesh slapping together echoing off the tiled walls. Keegan tilted Logan's hips up a bit, searching and sinking into a new position each time he pulled in and out, his own groans were growing in tempo.

"Aaah, oh fuck..Keegan!" Logan's shout was muffled behind Keegan's palm, as Keegan shifted his hips constantly hitting a new spot inside of him with each thrust. He's close already, he can make out his name being spoken deep and low from Keegan's lips, right at the top of his spine. Everything felt so good, so dirty compared to their first time and he wanted it to last forever, but how could it when he Keegan pounded into him deep and pulled his hips back at just the right angle, a rapid string of moans, whimpers and curses coming from the younger man as he pushed back at the shock waves of pleasure as he came, shouting Keegan's name behind his closed palm, his cock leaking with no contact.

Keegan's close, his breathing is hard, his hips snap forward with a force and harshness Logan wasn't used to, but it felt incredible to his tingling body as he rode out his orgasm, the rough thrusts rippling the intense pleasure throughout his body, Keegan's hips stutter and still as he comes, his forehead pressed to Logan's shoulder blade as he groans deep controlling the volume, his teeth just grazing over Logan's back.

At once, Keegan's hand drops from Logan's mouth, while both men are stuck like that for a moment, panting hard and twitching with the aftershocks, Keegan pressing loving kisses across Logan's back, the hand previously over his mouth cups Logan's cheek, rubbing his palm on the younger man's stubbled cheek, Logan nuzzles into the touch, feeling affectionate and lazy. And still aroused. Keegan kisses his shoulder and pulls out, using his t-shirt to clean up.

Logan turns around on the wall and smiles almost-drunkenly at Keegan. "Can we do it again?"

"Kid...we need to get out of this locker room first." Keegan chuckled through an exhale, kissing Logan softly.

Logan snaps out of the dream-like daze and breaks away from the kiss. "I'm sensing there's a yes in there somewhere." Their faces are close enough to where, if he wasn't looking Keegan in the eyes, he'd be cross-eyed. Thankfully, he's not. That would be a horrific turn off, but that didn't stop him from slipping his hands down Keegan's body, stopping before he reached his cock, he imagined the noises he could drawl out of Keegan from palming him in his sensitive state.

"Priorities, Logan." Keegan urged with another firm kiss, but the look in his eyes told him that yes, there would be a round 2, 3, and maybe Logan could push for four or five. He could certainly try. And he would.

"Oh, right. Um..get out of here. Well, then, what are we waiting for? Let's go, I haven't had my fill of you yet." Logan paused to laugh, a laugh that faded at the dirty smirk Keegan was giving him. "That was either the poorest choice of words or the best." He was thinking it was the best, of course.

Logan jumps into action, as if he wasn't just fucked into the wall, quite literally, and grabs his towel, running it over his pretty much dry blonde hair. He spots his clothing on the bench and grabs them, bending over to pull on his boxers, and Keegan is still standing in place, his own boxers pulled back on, but his pants still down and his gaze is fully on Logan, looking like he was ready to shove him back in the alcove all over again, those sharks seem tame compared to Keegan.

The younger man clears his throat, partly to stop himself from letting Keegan fuck him against the wall again and partly for...no it was just for that. "Keegie, priorities." Logan reminds him, he almost laughed at Keegan eagerly pulling on his clothes. Apparently he wasn't the only one who hadn't gotten enough.

"You're kind of distracting..." Keegan replied gruffly, the scratch in his voice runs deeper, as does his intense stare.

Reaching for his shirt, Logan paused, looking over Keegan's body. "Wait, aren't you still dirty from the mission...and just now?" Logan said, a smile growing on his lips as he peeked over at the shower.

Keegan dropped his shirt to the floor and gave himself a look-over, a smirk playing on his lips as he sauntered over to Logan, "You're right..." Keegan said lowly, tugging Logan into his arms and under the heated pressure of the group showers. It was Logan's turn to push Keegan to his limits, finding out that even a man like him could need something to mute the cries, he uses his mouth instead of a hand. Wisely, they lock the shower room door this time.

* * *

The next day Logan is definitely feeling round three and four from last night, a slight ache, a little foreign to him still, but not unwelcome in the least. The pain in his ribs is a distant memory, one he doesn't linger on too long because it's dull enough to ignored. He's on his 215th push up in the break room, 'stay fit, stay focused' his dad's words were never to far from the front of his mind, and now he had another reason, a person that gave him a new perspective of love he'd never felt before, to maintain that focus, keep his body strong, to fight. Riley's laying on the carpet watching him the entire time, a betrayed look in the dog's eyes that's been there the whole day. Logan sighs and lets himself fall to the floor on number 221.

"Come on, Riley. Stop giving me that look. I know you miss sleeping with me...but trust me, you should be glad you weren't in Keegan's room last night." Logan assured the dog, lifting himself to his feet and kneeling next to Riley, patting him on the head. "Honestly buddy, you might not wanna sleep at the end of me and Keegan's bed...ever again." Logan said with a contorted expression.

Riley didn't move, his head rested in his front paws, a pathetic look in his eyes directed at Logan as a single whine left the dog _. 'Oh now he was pushing it, how guilty can he make me feel? Shit.'_ Logan thought, his head shaking back and forth.

"Look, I'll make it up to you. Our game of fetch got...interrupted yesterday, we could —" Logan was cut off as Keegan walked into the room. He gave the older man a beaming grin as he walked over to him and Riley, but the smile dropped as he caught sight of Keegan's expression, jaw tight and brows pulled down, his own mouth dropped one end.

"Kid, we need to talk." Keegan said gruffly, dropping onto the couch.

"Ok um.., Keegie, those words a little terrifying, can you give me more than that, is something wrong?" Logan stood up and sat next to Keegan, sinking into the plush cushions, which did nothing to comfort him now, and he turned towards Keegan, tucking a leg under him, an arm on the back, his fist clenched.

Keegan's hands came together in his lap, as he wrestled with his words for a few moments. "I'm being sent to Colorado...tomorrow." He said in a hushed tone.

"Wait, you? Just you? What about the rest of us?" Logan questioned, confusion flashing on his face, coating his voice with brittle worry.

"Elias tasked Kick and me," Keegan said with a short nod, "Pick up some intel on the Feds, Rorke, whatever other secrets we can find, and then we rendezvous in Vegas, where you'll be with the rest of the team." He finished, his voice strong and solid, despite the anxiety clouding in his vision, lacing on the tip of his tongue.

Logan's jaw tightened as he slowly nodded, avoiding Keegan's gaze. "Alright..." Riley got up from his sulking position and laid in front of the couch at their feet, no longer looking upset with Logan, in fact it was like he was comforting him now, not that it helped much.

"Are you ok, kid?" Keegan shifted closer to Logan, not bothering to check over his shoulder as he lifted his hand and brushed the back of it on Logan's face.

"Yeah. No? I don't know, this is the first mission since we met that we won't be together on. It's weird, I've been a soldier for 8 years, hell most of my life, and most of the time it was without you, but knowing you won't next to me out there doesn't feel right anymore." Logan admitted with a weak smile, faltering on the edges.

Keegan tensed for a moment, "We'll only be apart for a few hours, it'll be fine." He said quietly, sounding like he was trying to convince himself more than Logan, and that look was in his eyes again, the one that twined with either a memory or emotion, either way it was still unknown to the younger man.

'Fine.' Logan was getting sick of hearing that word, how long could things be fine until their time ran out and they were far from it. Logan stared at Keegan harder, trying to decipher in vain what his expression meant, but gave up and shrank into the couch, leaning into Keegan. The older man responded at once, wrapping his arms around him, holding him like all the times he dreamed about before when he napped on this very couch, the chair Keegan used to occupy was empty now, probably always would be from now on. At least he hoped that. That Keegan would lay with him here and that they would even get that chance to have this for a little longer. The rest of his life sounded like a good amount of time.

"How long have you known about the mission?" Logan asked, absentmindedly picking at the hem of Keegan's black shirt and hair on his forearm.

Keegan cleared his throat, the sound was loud next to Logan's head, leaned on his chest. "Since last night, that's what your dad pulled me off for, to tell me. Brief me on the details."

Logan's head flew off his chest. "You knew since last night, but didn't tell me?" He snapped.

"That's why I came into the locker room, to find you and let you know, but..you weren't really in a talking mood." Keegan mumbled.

A flush rose on Logan's cheeks picturing their locker room...encounter, then in the bedroom. Talking did happen, but not exactly in professional manner. "Oh — well I...couldn't help it, shit. We barely touched in two days and I missed you like crazy. Plus I needed to feel..like things were ok, normal in a way, I mean as much as they can be nowadays. After what we saw at the Fed's factory. It shook me up. I need us to be...ok." Logan confessed with a shaky voice that normally would have left him ashamed, but not with Keegan.

Keegan took his hands in his own, his thumb dragging over his wrist. "I wasn't exactly complaining, I missed you too...especially after Elias told me about the mission. But you got shaken up? I didn't know." Keegan murmured, squeezing Logan's hands. "Do you wanna talk about it?"

"Yeah, uh, I can be good at hiding things, mostly when I'm...turned on. But — anyways, no. I don't really wanna talk about it. I just don't get it, I'm usually the positive one, I can see things going back to the way things were, before the Feds fucked us over, but I know that's not realistic. Life changed forever, and I guess I'm holding onto the things that make me feel like life isn't so damn fucked nowadays; my family, friends...and you. You push me to fight harder, to end this war so we can have something that used to be everyone's dream. We're pretty lucky you know. Finding love in this fucked crater of a country, someone to live for, fight for..." The thick emotion clogged Logan's throat, but he managed to get the words out, it felt like a splash of cool water to tell someone, anyone his carefully hid worries, but it meant the most for it to be to Keegan, the one who should be hearing it.

Keegan inched his face closer and pressed his forehead into Logan's, his eyes closed. "I won't stop fighting, kid. For everyone we've lost, friends, family...for those who need to be protected, and for us." His eyes opened again.

It was like a sentiment, fuck, his words were similar to those you'd motivational poems put on posters and hung up, there to glance to when times got tough, but Logan took them instead into his heart and mind, committed them his memory, word for word. There were bigger things going on, but a simple reassurance from Keegan meant everything. He meant everything.

"I was molded for this, for fighting. I'll never break." Logan breathed out, looking Keegan square in the eyes, his forehead pressing closer.

With a exhale, Keegan grazed his fingers over Logan's face, tracing the determined set of lines between his brows. "Solider on, then?" Keegan whispered, fanning his breath on Logan's face.

"Soldiering on, sounds about right." Logan agreed with a nod, their noses brushing together.

"We're both made for that." Keegan's mouth upturned on one end. "But we might have been pushing our luck last night, kid." He pulled his forehead away and peered at the younger man.

Logan shrugged, a wolfish grin on his mouth. "Who cares, risks make things interesting."

"They also make things dangerous.." Keegan looked serious, a hard stare directed at Logan. Not scolding, but scared. Apparently Keegan was capable of feeling fear no matter how collected he appeared.

"Are we still talking about having sex in the locker room or...?" Logan asked, his smile disappearing into a frown of worry.

"No, not completely." Keegan's fingers drifted to the stitches on Logan's no longer bandaged wrist, feeling the bumps and twists of the sutures.

"What the hell does that mean?"

The words stuck in Keegan's throat, not willing to escape just yet, so he divulged something else, his voice lower. "Just be careful out there. Don't forget to duck, keep an eye on your surroundings, the standard stuff...take care of yourself, please. I know you're a Ghost, but you're so much more than that to me...I need —" Keegan stopped there, looking Logan dead in his eyes, trying to push the words out with his intense gaze.

Logan's heart seized in his chest at the emotions reflected in his icy stare. There wasn't any doubt how much he meant to the other man, it was a little scary, to know how you could be someone's world, their comfort and home. A person could be home, and if they were with you, even if only in your heart or a photograph, as long as you piece of them, you were home.

"Hold on, this might be stupid but..um..just wait." Logan removed his hands from Keegan's and hopped off the couch, Keegan's fading warm hands stayed in place as his eyes followed the younger man's movement.

Logan walked to the end table on the left side of the room and opened the drawer, picking up a small object and hiding it in his hand, Keegan's brows furrowed as he looked at Logan's closed hand. He remained silent in spite of his growing curiosity, something Logan could never do. Logan stepped over Riley's sleeping form and sat back down, closer to Keegan this time, facing and nearly straddling him at his point.

"Let me see your wrist, your left one." Logan said jutting his head in the direction of Keegan's arm.

The perplexed expression on Keegan's face grew, but he did as he was told and placed his hand on Logan's thigh, face up. Logan swallowed hard seeing the raised blue veins in the older man's wrist leading up to his forearm, he resisted leaning down and pressing kisses to it. He opened his fingers and revealed to Keegan his gift, a paracord bracelet, identical to his own, dark olive colored and tightly woven. He watched as Keegan's eyes looked from Logan's left wrist to the bracelet in the younger man's hand. Logan wrapped the bracelet on Keegan's wrist and snapped the buckle, securing it in place, his fingers dragged on the sides of it, soft and trailing.

Keegan let out a deep exhale as he examined the woven cords of the bracelet. "Where'd you get this?" Keegan asked, breaking contact with the gift to fix his stare on Logan's smiling face, a similar one twitched on the edges of his mouth at the sight.

Logan rubbed the back of his neck, "I made it yesterday when I needed to do something to take my mind off the war for a little while...and I've noticed how much you look at mine." Logan told him with a shrug. "Thought I'd give you something, so no matter where I am, you can always have a part of me with you." Logan remembered how Merrick said he would hold him close, but he couldn't always be there. Now a part of him could.

Keegan took in a deep breath, his face held a inscrutable expression, but the warm smile returned to his mouth, striking and fully amorous, "Thanks, kid."

Logan's heart hammered at the closeness of their faces, the smile on Keegan's face, the heat of his breath mingling with his own. "These aren't just for looking awesome, by the way, dad taught me and Hesh how to make them when we were kids, took us hiking or camping nearly every weekend, said these could save our lives someday."

"Yeah...I had a friend in the SEALS, wore one in case of emergency, for the rope." Keegan said with a nod, his gaze locked on the bracelet again. "Looks like you're saving me again."

"Again, huh?" Logan questioned, his head twisting in confusion.

Keegan seemed to hesitate, like he was battling to say the words he wanted to say against the ones that were easier. "You don't remember that dream you had the other night? With me and the sharks?" Keegan said with an amused smile.

From the looks of it, he went with the easier response. But Logan remembered Keegan's words _'I will. Just give me some time.'_ and his promise that he'd wait it out, no matter how curious he was, so he let it go. "Please tell me you didn't...oh fuck." Logan threw a hand over his face, dragging it down slowly.

"It was kinda cute.."

"No, no..no..please stop. My sleep talking isn't cute, it's weird and mortifying."

"Adorable, I think you forgot that." Keegan teased lightly, but it looked like he meant it. Logan removed the hand from his face and had a 4 second staring contest with Keegan, apparently Logan was awful at it, for the moment Keegan winked at him looking carefree and warm as if he truly did think his humiliating night mumbles were endearing, Logan blinked several times in fluttering wisps. 

"How in the freakin' world is it adorable?" Logan asked with a half-frown and a light rouge coloring his cheeks.

Keegan playfully pursed his lips, his eyes flicking about the room in thought before settling back on Logan. "You do say my name a lot between these sighs and smiles, you did it before we were together too, I'd be reading and hear you whisper my name, but I'd look up and you'd be fast asleep, smiling and wrapped up in the blanet." Keegan informed him with a soft smile from the memory.

"Keegie..." Logan shook his head in embarrassment and leaned forward, silencing Keegan with a kiss, full and hard on the other man's lips. He felt Keegan's smile growing into the kiss, a moan escaping his throat at the contact, his hand winded around Logan's body and pulled him into his lap, Logan fixed his legs on either side of Keegan's body. Keegan licked at Logan's bottom lip and kissed it after, Logan coughed, or laughed, or actually groaned, his mouth opening so their tongues could slid together. Keegan's hands were applying pressure, dragging down his back and slipping under his shirt just to feel his bare flesh, Logan could feel the bracelet scratching on his skin, his hips grinding and writhing on top of Keegan. It takes all control not to rip off Keegan's t-shirt, to have his hands make up for the lost time before it's actually gone, but it doesn't stop him from digging his fingers into Keegan's chest and drift down to the front of the other man's pants. Keegan is not exactly holding back either, his hands move down and are in a vice grip on Logan's ass, rutting him forward.

Stuttering breaths and low moans are all that's heard for awhile, an intoxicating rise and fall of the other's chest. Then, a warning noise from Riley is all they got before a sharp, surprised intake of breath tore apart their heated kiss, Logan's head shot up, and there was Hesh standing in the doorway of the now open door break room door, his eyes comically wide and shock colored his expression. That's a mood killer.

"What...the fuck." Hesh ground out, he somehow managed to look a combination of confused, bewildered, and for whatever reason, hurt.

His brother standing right in front of him while he's smothered on top of Keegan is a shock at first, Logan can't will his body to move like it did in the hospital room, so Keegan is pushing him off, the opposite of what he was doing just a few moments ago, it's clicks the logic in his brain to his legs, Logan stumbles out of Keegan's lap and stands upright, fixing his shirt, the hardness in his pants is not as easy to disguise, so he opts to doing an awkward wiggle stand, his hands twisting about in an attempt to make an awkward situation less awkward. While he's in the middle of adjusting his pants, and failing, Keegan rose to feet as well, how the hell does he look calm and yet so fucking disheveled and sexy? It's not fair, especially when he's directly in front of his brother.

A hand fell to Logan's back, both comforting and a sign that he wasn't going anywhere if Logan needed him. He spared a glance at Keegan, he had a carefully constructed mutual face, but he was sending a supportive glance at Logan. That was enough for him.

"Um hey, Hesh. This is...exactly what it looks like." Logan felt it was better to not make any useless excuses, he tried to lighten the tense atmosphere with a crooked smile, the same one he gave his brother when they were kids to end a stupid argument, but Hesh wasn't budging this time, guess he wasn't as boyish and innocent anymore. Clearly not, as he was still feeling uncomfortably stiff in his pants.

Hesh had a hard stare pointed at Logan, not acknowledging Keegan in the least. "Can I talk to my brother, Keegan?" Hesh asked calmly, still not looking away from Logan.

Keegan turned his head back to Logan, his eyes searching for an answer, an affirmation, Logan nodded to him. Keegan's hand squeezed Logan's briefly as he left his side, Riley stood from the floor and followed Keegan out the door, Logan envied the dog for a moment, not only was he getting to leave with Keegan, but he didn't have to be apart of this sure to be unpleasant conversation.

"What the hell are you doing, Logan?" Hesh asked in a steady voice, walking around the couch and standing in front of his brother. The same expression he had when he first caught Keegan and him together hadn't disappeared, it was an odd combination with his even tone.

Feeling a little more uncomfortable and defensive under his brother's stare, Logan crossed his arms. "It's pretty obvious, isn't it? ...Me and Keegan are together." Logan told him. It felt like a huge relief to say the words out loud, even if Hesh's eyes grew wider at the declaration.

"So it's serious, what's between you two? It's not just a hook up to blow off steam?"

"We're serious." Not that Hesh would ever understand fully, _how_ serious.

Hesh nodded slowly, taking in the information, the shocked expression shifted into firm concentration, like he was trying to work something out in his head. "You sure this is a good idea, Logan, with who we are, what we do?" Hesh questioned seriously, a concerned look in his eyes.

"I don't care what anyone thinks, it doesn't matter if it's not right for someone else. I...love him, and that's not gonna change. We know what we're getting into." Logan's arms uncrossed, feeling the tension all but evaporate.

The huge eyes returned for a brief second with his brother's confession, but dropped at once, trying to listen and not push his brother away. "Love him? You're _in love_ with Keegan?"

"I am." Logan said softly. That was the understatement of the century, it almost made him laugh at how simple the words sounded although they meant so much more than he could convey.

"Damn...that's crazy." Hesh laughed, rubbing the back of his neck.

"What the hell is so crazy about it?" Logan asked with a frown.

"I...can't believe it, that's all." Hesh said carefully with a shrug.

"What, that I'm with a guy?" Logan almost felt like putting up his guard again, but kept himself reserved. He supposed it would be...a bit of odd to see him all over a guy if he had no idea that he was even into men.

"No, it's not that. You being with a guy doesn't bother me at all. But, if I'm being honest, I didn't think you were interested in anyone, married to the job, ya know? You haven't exactly been on dates or brought anyone home since you were 14." Hesh chided lightly with a smirk.

"Well, it's kinda hard to find time to date when the world has gone to hell." Logan muttered, plopping down onto the couch.

"Fair point." Hesh said with a wave of his hand, sitting next to Logan. "So, what makes Keegan a shade of grey in the world of black and white?" He asked, genuinely interested, facing his brother with an open expression.

Logan looked away and glanced at the chair next to the couch, he could almost picture Keegan sitting there with a book in his hand and a deep, hushed voice reading to Logan when he asked him what part he was on, Keegan's low melodic tone lulling him to sleep. "I never really gave much thought to being with anyone...but Keegan. I — it's different with him He's different."

Hesh followed where his eyes went, a thoughtful downturn on his lips.

Logan's eyes narrowed at the frown on his brother's mouth. "You have a problem, Hesh?" He asked, leaning forward and drumming his index fingers on the table in front of the couch.

"No, no, it's not that I have a problem with you two being together, fuck, I'm happy for you, Logan, you deserve to have someone." Hesh said sincerely, giving him small smile, but his eyes were disguising a hint of hurt, something was still bothering him. "I'm just wondering, how long has this been going on? How long have I been so blind to my own brother's love life?"

It was just what he was worried about, Hesh was a upset that he was in the dark about the whole thing. "You really never noticed _anything_ between me and Keegan...really? I mean I thought I was a good actor, but I'm hardly poker-faced around Keegan...it's kinda hard for me not to smile like an idiot around him. Then again, you didn't even realize it was dad at first when we found out he was a Ghost." Logan said with a laugh.

"Hey, no fair to bring that up." Hesh mumbled, giving Logan a sarcastic smile. Logan still couldn't believe that it took Hesh until their father pulled off his Ghost mask to know it was him, Logan knew from the moment he opened his mouth, when he saw him come through the ceiling with Keegan right behind. "I was shocked that's all. We'd just found out there were Ghosts, and now our dad was one? A lot to take it. And you're changing the subject." Hesh crossed his arms and leaned back on the couch, tilting his head. "Thing thing is...I don't get why you didn't tell me? I'm your brother, Logan, we never have kept secrets from each other...ever. You should have known I'd be supportive. How come I had to find out about you two the way I did?" Hesh asked, he was using that tone that made Logan feel guilty all over again. How unfair could things get for Logan today?

"I...we just got together a couple days ago, Hesh! I was still figuring out the right way to break the news and I wasn't sure _how_ to tell you.. It's not exactly something you bring up in a casual conversation... 'Target at your 3 O'clock, oh yeah, and me and Keegan are sharing a bed." Logan shot back, quirking a brow. He may have went a little far with the bed thing but at least he didn't divulge how much sex Keegan and him have had in the past couple days. Although the way he's been walking may have given that away already.

"OK, I'll give you that, it would be hard to bring up, but come on, bro, we tell each other everything."

"Look, Hesh, I didn't want you to find out like this. Like how you did was the literal exact last way I wanted you to find out about me and Keegan." Logan said with a scoffed laugh, Hesh returned it, finally looking not so tense.

"Not what I was planning on walking in on...I'm trying my best to forget it, thanks." Hesh placed his hands on his knees and lifted off the couch. "Well, it's all good. You're with Keegan, huh, that will take some getting used to." He said with a shrug, but he didn't look bothered any long. "What I came in here for in the first place was to ask you where the hell I put my shotgun cleaning kit. Figured I should get the old girl ready for anything for Vegas..."

Logan stood too, following his brother out the door. "Damn Hesh, first can't recognize our own dad,  can't tell me and Keegan are madly in love, and now your losing your memory too?" Logan jested, nudging Hesh in the ribs with his elbow, both of them trying to walk out the door at the same time.

"That's it..." Hesh makes it out of the door way first giving Logan his finest and messiest noggie on the top of Logan's head, their laughter can be heard throughout the entire base. When Logan catches sight of his hair later, it's close to being as messy as post-sex hair with Keegan.

Close.

But not at all.

* * *

It didn't take long after that conversation for Logan to come clean to Kick, figuring now that Merrick and Hesh knew, why not just tell everyone else.

"Say again. Keegan and you are together?" Kick asked, stirring a stick and mixing the cream in his 8th cup of coffee. Kick had a pre-mission tradition of guzzling down at least 50 ounces of caffeinated beverages before-hand, says it keeps him shooting longer than the other guys, or hacking, or acquiring escape vehicles. Whatever the hell Kick's specialty was for the moment.

"Um yeah. You could say that, Kick." Logan replied, nearly tripping over Riley with his cup of some vitamin water supplement water shit Hesh suggested he try as they walked to the small table in the base's kitchen and sat down. He was a bit of an expert at catching himself before he fell from 25 years of dealing with it...in a literal sense at least. When it came to falling figuratively, that was shot to hell the moment he laid eyes on a certain scout sniper.

Kick took a large gulp of coffee and sat down opposite of Logan, grinning afterwards, coffee smeared on his top lip as he fixed the cap on his head. "Fin-a-fucking-lly. Someone needed to get that stick out of Keegan's ass. Hadn't seen the guy smile in all the years I've known him, thought he was a robot for a while. It's nice to see he's at least an advanced AI capable of loving."

"On Keegan's behalf, I'm glaring at you, on my behalf I'm...thanking you for the sort of support and letting you know, Keegan is the furthest thing from a robot. He's all man, I can guarantee you that." Logan stated with simple directness, a little too forward, maybe, Kick cringed a bit at the divulged information, but recovered, sipping a little slower at his coffee and staring off to the side.

"I'm serious, Logan. Ajax and me..." Kick started, the smile dropping from his mouth for a moment as he thought of his fallen friend, "Ajax and me had this bet going, I bet that we'd never see Keegan laugh or smile, but Ajax was fucking convinced, dead set, that someday he would. Fuck, he'd tell this stupid jokes during every mission trying to get a rise out of Keegan, bought this huge joke book one time and memorized the whole thing, but nothing ever worked, of course, he would remain blank as ever, or at the most, give a scoff sort of laugh. But...it turns out he was right. Ajax won the bet. Wish he could have been here to rid me of all my petty pocket change, burn this cap of mine he hated so much." Kick trailed off with a wistful smile, pointing a finger to his head, his mind a million miles away now, sending out a prayer for his lost friend.

It was hard for Logan to picture Keegan the way everyone else did. How was it like to know Keegan as a silent, distant shell of a man? Nearly from the moment he met Keegan there was always some kind of glint in his eyes, always the smallest upturn on his lips.

Logan ran a finger over the edge of his cup. "I'm sorry, man...you and Ajax were close?" Logan said, his voice empathetic, he's been there, lost a lot of friends..family.

"Hell yeah, he was a brother to me. Still — still hard to believe he's not here anymore. But he was a good guy, sweet too...he would've been fucking stoked for you and Keegan." Kick said with a soft look in his eyes. "Guess he rubbed off on me because I'm pretty damn happy for you guys too. Live and let live right?"

"Yeah. Thanks, Kick." Keegan grunted, entering the kitchen looking sweaty, his black shirt clinging to his chest, drops of perspiration sliding down his neck. Post work out? Naturally Logan's thoughts drifted to more x-rated things...if Kick wasn't here and they weren't on the base..not that it stopped them last night.

"Logan, come on, think you could reel in the tongue while I'm around? You're drooling everywhere, man." Kick said, his vulnerable appearance was gone and clearly he was back to his typical ways.

"I don't mind it." Keegan countered, giving a small wink to Logan and walking to the table, settling behind Logan's chair.

"Hey, I said I support the relationship, not that I want to be a part of foreplay. I'm kinky, but not that much." Kick shook his hands in front of them, a near horrified look in his eyes at the prospect.

"We all know your true love is a laptop, Kick, we wouldn't impose on that clearly committed relationship." Keegan said dryly, picking up the cup of...questionable liquid in front of Logan and taking a drink, holding his carefully poker face despite the bitter taste.

"See, look at this guy, even when he's joking he doesn't crack a damn smile, oh but I bet he does with you." Kick huffed out a breath of air. "And by the way, her name is Lara, Lara the laptop and me and her have been through so much together." He added with a dreamy sigh, much like the one Logan suppressed out at lunch a few days ago.

"Lara...the laptop...? Dude, that is...you know, that is just what I would expect from you, never mind." Logan muttered, shifting in his chair, Keegan laughed deep in his chest and leaned down and kissed Logan on the lips, lingering a bit on purpose.

"How're you gonna tell Elias?" Kick asked a bit slowly, his eyes flicking about.

Logan and Keegan broke apart, not without effort, Keegan didn't remove all contact, leaving a hand on top of Logan's head, mussing about in his hair.

"Um...I don't have a clue." Logan answered.

"You might wanna start searching for one, fast, because..." Kick nodded to the kitchen entrance. Logan and Keegan glanced to the doorway, and sure enough, there was Elias. 

"Logan. Walk with me." Elias said firmly. He didn't look shocked or hurt like Hesh, or near cheerful and cheeky as Kick did, his expression held a different range of emotions, Logan couldn't tell if they were good or bad.

Keegan didn't ask for the silent consent this time, instead his removed his hands all on his own, not before letting his fingers graze down the side of Logan's face and giving him a small, secret smile and moving out his way. Logan swallowed hard and nodded again, not to Keegan, but to his dad, his commanding officer, and stood from his chair, following his dad out to the porch off the kitchen. As they were leaving Logan could hear Kick say, "This is gonna be good." followed by a noise and a grunt of pain. Ah, Keegan.

Elias leaned his hands on the railing, his eyes focused on the scene of destruction that was San Diego. "Walkers don't keep secrets, son. Why would you keep this hidden?" Elias asked. The words closely resembled Hesh's, the hurt wasn't there in his father's eyes though, just a curiosity.

"Dad, I — I was getting around to tell you, I told everyone else...but I didn't know how you'd take it. Haven't you ever kept something hidden, for whatever reason? Whether it be guilt or fear of the person's response?" Logan questioned, mimicking his father and leaning on the railing. Ok, it wasn't fair to avoid the subject, especially trying to drawl out something that had been bugging him from the moment Keegan told him.

Elias' head shot over to him, it seemed as if a silent revelation was hidden there, one that was kept down for so long. Maybe not any longer. "I have." He said simply, though it was anything but.

"Guess we have that in common then..." Logan said quietly, waiting for his dad to continue.

"Your mom. Keegan told you?" Elias asked, turning inwards on the railing, his back now rested on it.

"Yeah...but he thought I knew already." Logan squinted at the setting sun, then to his dad, his face read that he was a million miles away. "You first, why didn't you tell me and Hesh, dad? I mean, I get why you didn't when we were little kids, but...all this time?" Logan questioned, not accusingly, not angry or resentful in the least. It was a careful question.

There was silence for near two minutes, the breeze whipping around in the few tall standing trees, Elias seemed to be considering his words and re-considering over again, but Logan had learned his patience from this very man, so he waited.

"Because it was my fault. She died because of me. She died for me." Even after all the years that had passed since that day, 22 years seemed like only yesterday by the look in his father's eyes, the pain rolled off him like bolts.

"She was a soldier, it was her call. Her choice to save you. If she didn't take the shot then you wouldn't be here... There's nothing you could have done to stop it." Logan whispered. He'd never seen his dad this way before, he wondered how long he'd been holding all this in? Had he really never talked about it in 22 years? Since she passed?

"I know. But it still haunts me, every night I relive it." Elias confessed, his eyes closing for a moment, and reopening, glancing to Logan full on. "I wanted to tell you boys the truth for years. I wish you could have heard it from me first, you should have."

Logan twisted his fingers in front of himself. "Hesh doesn't know yet. I think you should tell him." He said with a solid nod.

Elias returned it, his brows remained pinched together, "After we do what needs to be done in Vegas, I will."

"OK..." Well talking about it was easier than Logan thought. He didn't need his dad to explain it, or defend his reasons for not telling him, maybe he would have to for Hesh, but for Logan, what was said was enough. More than. Maybe you had to be in love to get it? To know how it can tear you apart to lose the one person that means...well there isn't a word for how much. It felt good to clear the air, but there was still another matter. "So...me and Keegan?" Logan asked, kicking at a rock on the porch.

"Look, son, you're a man, your choices are yours alone and yours to make. And if you want to be with Keegan, if that's your choice, than I have no right to stand in your way." Elias imparted, his solid tone of voice returning, but a fatherly warmth was under the surface.

"But are you OK with it?" It wouldn't matter normally, but this was his dad, one of the most important people to him. It mattered enough for him to want to know.

A smile grew on the edges of his father's mouth. "I see how he looks at you. I saw it from the beginning, how he watches over you. Even walked past the break room a couple weeks back and saw Keegan covering you with a blanket, he touched your face and whispered something to you. Guess you were talking in your sleep again and upset about something, I could hear him saying that he was right there, that he wouldn't leave you." Elias told him.

Logan swallowed back the rush of emotion thick in his throat, it could have been in embarrassment, but it was mostly affection, strong, powerful. He had no memory of the event, but he did remember so many nightmares that were tamed, turned to something soothing after a rough scratch that was somehow the softest sound he ever heard. It was Keegan, it'd always had been Keegan.

"Part of me knew right then that he loved you, I should've known he would. You two are just like your mom and me were." Elias paused to laugh quietly, reminiscing on long past time. "I was quiet and distant, but then she came into my life and shook my world, showed me I didn't have to be alone. We knew the risks and so do you two, but knowing them doesn't change anything. Just...keep him close." He finished with a fixed expression, both a warning and a blessing.

"Of course." Like Logan would keep him anything but, whenever possible or rational. "You're always saying I'm like mom." Logan said with a short laugh, rubbing the back of his neck.

"Because you are, son. You're the spiting image of her inside and out, the strengths, the smile, the sleep talking." Elias smirked at the last one, and it grew at the sudden bug-eyed expression on his son's face.

"Ha! Really? Mom did that too?" Logan asked with another huff of laughter.

"Yeah, that's how I found out how she loved me, laying next to her one night and I heard her mumbling something...couldn't believe it. I was itching to tell her for weeks that I loved her and she beat me to it, in her sleep." Elias shook his head at the memory, they both shared a chuckle.

The laughter died down after a few seconds as they reflected, Logan squinted at the sunset again, the sun below the clouds leaving the sky painted with orange and pink hues, flicks of gold throughout, like his mom's hair had been, like his was. "I miss her." Logan said, breaking the silence.

"Me too. Every day." Elias tore his stare from the sunset and walked up to Logan. "But I have a piece of her right in front of me. She's not really gone." Hugs weren't something Logan got a lot of, they were few, rare, but special as hell, and now Elias pulled Logan into a tight hug. At first, Logan was frozen, his dad wasn't the hugging type, but here he was, patting both of his hands at his son's back. Logan returned the grasp, his own hands copying the patting motions. It was a brief embrace, Elias pulled out of it, but rested a hand on Logan's shoulder. "We'll visit your mom's grave, after Vegas, we'll make some time."

"I have a lot to tell her." Logan's smile was wet, or his eyes were, his emotions were a little clumsy at the moment too, but apparently his father's were as well, glossy eyes and all.

* * *

Keegan and Logan laid on the couch, feet propped up on the table, the blanket around them both, and Logan's curled on Keegan's chest, drowsy, but sleep is the last thing on his mind. His fingers play with the collar of Keegan's clean white shirt, the bright color brings out the icy blue of his eyes in a way that left Logan with a gaspy inhale the first time he saw it. Logan's hair was still unruly from Hesh fist nudging it roughly, but Keegan threaded his finger's through it, fixing the disarray of golden locks, making his own mess of it in gentler strokes and brushes. It's damn near therapeutic after a long day. This was nice, but the thought of Keegan pining him by the wrists to the mattress would work too. Later, there was time later. Not too much later, he almost mastered patience, but he wasn't perfect. Not by a long shot.

"Well, everyone knows...everyone that matters at least. Surprisingly it was a lot less terrifying than I pictured in my head." Logan grumbled, his fingers feeling the scars and fading scabs on Keegan's knuckle.

Keegan peered down at him, "How do you feel, now that it's out in the open?" Keegan asked.

Logan hummed and shifted on Keegan, moving in closer on him. "Relieved? Amazed that everyone took it so well? I don't know, I feel pretty much the same as before they did know, except I feel less guilty now that my family knows something so important. Guess they won't be questioning why I'm smiling all the damn time. But it might take them a while to get used to you doing it." Logan said, reaching up to feel the smile on Keegan's mouth, Keegan caught his hand in a light hold and kissed at the tips of his fingers.

"Ha, yeah. I knew about Kick and Ajax's bet they had going on. The night before he...died he told me this joke, one of the million, but anyways, I actually cracked a smile, shit, never seen Ajax so excited before, and that's saying something, he couldn't wait to rub it in Kick's face." Keegan whispered, a rueful look in his eyes.

Logan sat up, but kept the closeness. "Kick thinks he never got the chance. I bet it would mean a lot if he knew that Ajax saw first hand that he was right." Logan suggested.

"Probably the first time someone would actually be glad to lose something, I'll let him know." Keegan said, a small smile creeping back on the corners of his lips, Logan couldn't help but kiss it, liking how it felt pressed to his own lips.

"So...how do you feel, not that we're no longer a stealth couple?" Logan asked, moving his head back a bit to get a better view of Keegan's subtle face changes.

"Happy." Was all that Keegan said.

"And? That's it?" Logan scrutinized the way Keegan's expression changed when he asked the question. He still was a damn mystery.

"That's enough. Being this happy is something I haven't felt in a long time." Keegan replied, brushing a piece of hair off the top of Logan's forehead, his fingers stayed longer on the side of his face, moving down and cupping Logan's chin.

"Something looks like it's bothering you." Logan leaned into the touch, but didn't let up his analyzing.

"Ah, don't worry about it, just the pre-mission focus settling in." He murmured, bringing Logan in for a quick kiss.

Logan frowned into it and pulled away. "Keegie..." Logan said looking at him pointedly.

Keegan cleared his throat and glanced to the clock. "We can turn in early tonight, no one's gonna question why you're coming to my room anymore." Keegan's husky voice spoke in Logan's ear, making a shiver run down his spine.

Logan took a quick breath, both from the heated prickle that came from the breath fanned on his neck and from a trill of worry. "You're not leaving too early, right?" He asked.

With a sigh, Keegan answered, "I have to be the chopper at 4am."

"Shit. Yep, turning in early, come on." Logan ran his fingers over the paracord bracelet on Keegan's wrist, before he clasped his hand around Keegan's and stood from the couch, Logan's smile was enough to melt the creasing lines from Keegan's forehead. With a tight grasp, Keegan was lifted from the couch and tugged out of the break room.

The halls were empty, even Riley was absent, for once not looking around to find Logan. All the Ghosts were busy collecting their thoughts, reflecting, prepping for the mission. Things were coming to a head, tomorrow would change things, no doubt. Good or bad. But right now all that mattered to Logan was the hand around his, the man that smiled at him, no teeth, but it was held all in his eyes, soft and wrinkled at the sides, it was a breathtaking sight, really, to see a man like Keegan, usually so stoic and composed, looking at him like that,  and it all belonged to him.

Logan walked with Keegan the whole way, side by side, hand held tight, a warmth seeping down low as they closed the door behind them and clicked the lock. Nothing was a secret anymore, but that did nothing to dull the excitement or the sparks of heat on their skin as their lips met in a slow burning kiss as they undressed each other. It was still so new and fresh, people may say that the flutter in his heart and stirring feeling deep inside his stomach wouldn't always be this powerful, but Logan didn't think there was a damn chance that the sound of Keegan's moans as Logan left soft presses of his lips on his scars would ever get old. Or the way Keegan kept them on a slow simmer through each time they fucked, making sure that each moment was savored and drawn out.

Before they fell asleep and after they lay side by side, Keegan reached to the nightstand, the scraping sound of metal running across wood was heard, then Logan felt a twinge of cold that barely lasted as Keegan pressed a kiss to the back of his neck, up the line of it, and slipped his dog tag securely around Logan. Keegan's arms wrapped around Logan's chest and torso, they didn't say anything, there was no need.

The dog tag was his piece of Keegan, what he could carry onto the battlefield, the worn metal that lived through a thousand firefights that he could brush his fingers over and feel the name embedded on the surface. _**Keegan P. Russ.**_

Merrick said that Keegan would never let anyone take him away from Logan, but there was no way anyone was taking this or Keegan from him, no chance that he himself would be so easily destroyed. Logan fell asleep to the troubled noises muffled in the back of Keegan's throat and his arms, strong and protective, clinging to him, afraid to loosen his grip. Logan whispered to Keegan the same words he had to him, unbeknownst, but not any less comforting, "I'm here, Keegan. I'm not leaving you."

* * *

_'We could die here. Not exactly how I planned to go...'_

Bound to a chair in some sort of fucked up ceremony or symbol, his dad and brother directly across from him, Rorke's pacing and armed. Death. Logan could accept it, accept that he wasn't making it out of here alive. It was a bitter kind of acceptance. Keegan was scheduled to arrive in an hour. 60 minutes. And now he could be walking in to find him dead. Accepting you inevitable death was part of being a soldier, you knew that one day a bullet could hit a vital organ, or a grenade or I.E.D would be in your path and it'd end a flash.

Death was harder to come to terms with when you had someone that you waited for your whole damn life to meet and be with ask you with a look in their eyes, a look that showed they'd suffered through a loss already and couldn't bear to do it again. Not if it's you. You had to make it out, survive, first for yourself, but not far behind, for them...because they need you, they love you. ' _God, Keegan. I'm sorry. I don't think I can duck my way out of this one.'_ Keegan's dog tag around his neck felt as if it weighed a ton, it served as a remind that accepting death wasn't an option, he had to fight harder.

It seemed unlikely for him to pull his optimism out now as he's beaten by a fist for the tenth time, the blood in his mouth is his own, he spits it out and takes it. Pain never held him back before, why start now?

Then, the gun is pointed at his head, directly in his line of sight, he can smell the gun powder and when he closes his eyes he can pretend that it's the scent imprinted on Keegan's skin, that he's on top of him in the morning hours, a tired smile on both their faces, it's warm, it's simple, and like Keegan had said before, it's everything.

His dad's shouts and pleas are lost. His brothers incessant threats and curses are a muted white noise. Even through the clicking of the chambers he can only hear Keegan's laugh, the deep chuckle in his chest, the source; his heart. The memory of the sound is his shadow blocking the blaring light of the gun's barrel. Keegan wasn't his sun, he didn't burn or blind his eyes, Keegan was his shadow, his shade keeping him covered and clouding over the stark harshness of light. His presence dimmed the high violet of his anxieties, his deepest fears.

_'Focus. Logan. Focus.'_

Instead of his father's voice, it was Keegan.

That's when the gun is pulled away from his face, he feels the whoosh of air hitting him. Rorke moves away from him and towards his father. He could handle the gun pointed at himself, but this, this was too much to sit still through and watch, he felt a twitching in his hands, struggling against his bindings, he had to help his dad, how could he sit here and fucking do nothing, looking over to Hesh, he saw the same conflict in his eyes.

"Nice to have the family back together, isn't it? We're just missing our quiet friend." Rorke said evenly, a menacing undertone, leaning over to Elias. "Where's Keegan?"

That snapped something inside Logan, Rorke saying Keegan's name had him pulling every ounce of his strength to bite back the anger, the rage, but he kept it together, held it inside a wrecked cage like his father. For Hesh, it was impossible to hold his tongue, earning him another whip to the side of his face with the pistol, but Hesh didn't flinch, so neither did he. Perhaps, even if he'd grown to follow his own path, there would always be times he'd mirror his brother. Old habits and all. Which is why it was a tireless effort to keep his emotions in check each time Keegan's name was dropped, each time he was threatened.

But his father. How many times could he be struck before it was too much? He could see it in his dad's eyes, he wished there was a way to unsee it. The words that were caught in that expression, telling Hesh and him how proud he was of them, that'd it'd be ok. Goodbye. That was just as unacceptable as leaving Keegan, as giving up. Walker's fought to the very end, and the end sure as hell wasn't today.

Logan hears the shot and it's a shock to his system, hits him right in his reflexes spreading from his spiked heart. He would know that noise anywhere, it wasn't from Rorke's gun, but from a gun he'd heard endless times on the battlefield. _Keegan_.

Keegan's shot caught Rorke off guard long enough for Logan to give his most forceful kick, all of the fury that had been on a slow boil compacted right into it, right into Rorke's back. Rorke fumbles, Logan's dizzy, blood loss can do that to a man, the bullet that hits him in his shoulder doesn't exactly help. Logan fades in out and falls face down on the floor, he hears his dad, he hears his brother, he hears Merrick. But he _feels_ Keegan _._ When he's there. First, his voice reaches his ears, then his hands are there, cutting free the ropes with his knife and turning him over in his arms. The Ghost mask is covering half of his face, the black of the face paint covers the rest, but Logan can see his eyes, they're bright, shining, he blinks back against the black and holds onto the shadow, his shadow. Elias and Hesh are above him, but it's blurry and hard to make out their faces.

"Kid! Logan talk to me!" Keegan begs. "Oh god.." His hands coming up to Logan's wounded shoulder, applying pressure to the bloody gun shot wound, the red covers his hands. There's a shout, he thinks it's from Keegan, and a whine from Riley.

For the first time in hours, Logan exhales.

"Hey, ah fuck, I — to be fair, I couldn't really duck while I was tied to a chair." Logan huffs out in Keegan's hold. The look in Keegan's eyes was sheer panic, horrified the bullet hit him somewhere fatal, but from Logan's lopsided smile, through all the pain and blood on his face, he knew he was fine. Far from uninjured, but alive in his arms. Logan weakly puts up the 'OK' symbol with his fingers and that's when Keegan breaks out in a smile, it small, god it's the smallest one he's ever seen on his face, but fuck if it didn't hold more emotion than ever before. "Um...remember how I said that light houses were my new fear? I think it's safe to say...I fucking hate Las Vegas."

* * *

For the second time in a week, Logan found himself in a hospital room, a half-ass one this time, and he wasn't laying in a damn bed no matter what anyone said. Another bandage was strapped around himself, his shoulder this time, and no doubt he'd have a large scar to match the one on Keegan's abdomen.

Vegas was a close call. Too close. But here they were, all six of the Ghosts, over half of them beaten, but not broken, their fires to fight harder were over-fueled. Elias and Hesh escaped with nothing more than superficial injuries, their faces looked like hell, sure, black and blue all over making Logan's light house bruise look like a subtle discoloration. Merrick took the next worst, broken ribs. Logan felt his pain there, even told him that.

As usual, Logan somehow managed to take the brunt of the attack, his face was half as bad as his brother and dad's but his bullet wound left him with significant blood loss. Didn't keep him off his feet, however, two hours after the transfusions he all but jogged out of the hospital room, a silent Keegan following behind.

They didn't go back to San Diego. Thankfully, they had a base up in Reno, not too far off from Vegas, where they could stay for the night. Plan for their next move. Injuries didn't mean shit when you had a world to save.

Keegan hadn't left Logan's side since he found him bleeding out on the floor in Vegas, he'd not even held his hand or crushed him into a careful hug. Instead, his fingers ghosted over Logan's face, a creeping fear in his eyes mingling with relief.

Logan eyed him questioningly, sure he'd gotten a little banged up, but that was to be expected when you're dating Logan Walker, right? So why the hell did Keegan still look...no..it wasn't a unknown expression, Logan had seen it before. Many times. And his concern was overflowing, what had him on edge? Logan wanted to do something, anything to ease or erase the tension brewing behind Keegan's eyes, but they didn't get a moment alone since the night before Vegas.

Hesh and Keegan hadn't said much to each other in...well ever, really but when they arrived at the safe house, Hesh glanced to Keegan's wrist, to the bracelet in place there now, knowing exactly who it was from, and looked Keegan right in the eyes, his mouth twitched a smile.

"Keegan. I...thank you, for everything." Hesh whispered to him, his voice was tight.

Keegan nodded at Hesh, understanding just what 'everything' meant.

To most people the exchange may have seemed, distant, maybe cold. But Logan could only shake his head with a smile, he thought he was awkward with words, but these two took the cake, both of them struggled to find the right words and weren't the best with the emotional stuff.

In a move completely like his dad, Elias squeezed Keegan's shoulder as he walked by to turn in for the night, he communicated to Keegan silently with the touch, the pride swelling in Elias wasn't just for his sons, but his team, they were all a family. For his son, Elias gave a pat or three to his back, Logan caught the 'I love you's' in there somewhere between each one.

It had been a draining day, and Logan was done, even sex was far from his mind, sleep sounded nice, or laying with Keegan, just revile in the fact that they survived another fight, that they were together.

The rest of the Ghosts let Keegan and Logan have the room with the biggest bed, a kind gesture, but it might have also been because it was the furthest room from the rest. Either way, Logan locked the door.

Logan sat on the edge of the bed, for some reason the pain in his shoulder was a distant thought, a natural pain reliever was the euphoria of being alive. He shrugged out of his shirt, and tossed it to the floor, waiting for Keegan to undress and unwind himself, but he remained standing at the foot of the bed, staring hard at the dried blood on Logan's shirt, to the peeks of it on the gauze on his shoulder, his face paint was smudged and messy, glimpses of his pale flesh showed through and his brows were in a hard line, pulled together and downward, his jaw clenched like his fists. Logan could sense the distress in Keegan, it was like when he lay asleep murmuring in his throat, pulling him closer, but it was fiercer and more concentrated when he was awake.

"Keegan...what's wrong, talk to me." Logan said softly, his voice going up an octave from concern. He rose from the bed and placed his hands on the sides of Keegan's face, willing him to look him in the eyes.

Keegan's hands moved up and clasped over his, holding there for a few seconds, then bringing them down, still holding, but at his chest now. "I can't lose you." Keegan whispered, his eyes flicking all over Logan's face.

Logan's brows furrowed. "You didn't lose me, I'm right here."

"No, you don't understand... God, I could have been too late today." Keegan's eyes closed and reopened after a thudded heart beat, his eyes dark now, stuck in a 'what if'.

"You weren't. That's all that matters." Logan's thumbs stroked over Keegan's knuckles.

"But I could have been, just 5 more minutes and —"

Logan cut him off with a hug, their hands unwrapping, but his arms winded around Keegan's body, needing to comfort the older man, needing to feel him close. Keegan didn't hesitate returning the embrace, a hand came up to Logan's bare waist, the other to the back of his head, pressing a kiss to the top of Logan's hair.

"We're ok, Keegan. We're ok..." Logan assured him in hushed tone, his hands running smoothly up and down Keegan's back.

They stayed unmoving like that for a while, hearing the other's breathing, bringing them all the assurance and contentment they could hope for.

"I got that feeling, the night before I left for Colorado. It was intense, like it's been building up to it." Keegan murmured into Logan's hair.

Logan pulled his head off of Keegan's chest and looked him in the eyes. "The feeling... wait, the one you were talking about in the hospital a couple days back?" Logan asked with a sharp inhale, all the pieces clicking together.

"It's the feeling that's been haunting me, and god, I can't shake it off. I've tried to ignore it, push it out, but it's nagging in the back of my head. It feels unavoidable, that something is going to happen and you're gonna get taken from me." Keegan confessed, swallowing hard, his fingers brushed over his dog tag on Logan's chest, running over the chain. "Before that mission that made us Ghosts, I got a feeling just like it. And I lost him."

"That's...that's what feeling you've been talking about all this time?" Logan questioned slowly.

Keegan gave a firm nod. "Yes, and Vegas confirmed it for me. The Feds want you, I heard them over the radio, Logan." His voice tight and wound up, ready to snap.

"Well they're not gonna get me." Logan stated as if it were a fact, his hands took Keegan's and held on tight.

Keegan had a determined set in his brows as he spoke. "I'm not gonna let them either, but, Logan, Rorke isn't just some other soldier he's..."

"No, fuck that. Look, I'm not going anywhere. I'll be right by your side, we're gonna see this war through to the very end. Me and you, Keegan. Right?" Logan asked with a quirk of his head, staring Keegan intently in the eyes.

With a clenched jaw Keegan nodded, "You and me."

Logan leaned up into a kiss, it was like unraveling a tangled cord, smooth and twisting, their lips moved in tandem, a crushing relief to just take a moment and breath in each other, because they still could.

Keegan pulled his face away, keeping them close, and repeated, "You and me, kid."

It was strange, all of his life Logan spent his days following his dad, then following his brother. Now, after all this time, in the middle of a war, he finally found a person to walk next to, to stand beside, to face the unknown with, together.


	3. Not a new chapter, but an update!

Hello readers, new and old! It's been quite some time since I've last written anything, let alone on this site. I know most of you have given up hope on this story or any of my stories ever being updated. Well, I have good news and decently exciting news??? I have acquired a new laptop, FINALLY. Which means I can resume writing in the way I prefer. Most importantly, I have been feeling major bursts of inspiration for writing. Perhaps the long dreaded and loathed writer's block can kindly FOD. :) Which thanks to there being no hint whatsoever of a sequel to my beloved Call of Duty Ghosts...I must take it upon myself to finish Logan Walker's story. This is a thank you to every single of you that have been patient and loyal for all these years. I truly have love for you all!   
Also, my old tumblr is GONZO. I lost the password and am locked out. SO, you can find me and bug me for updates at : chicarose.tumblr.com  
thanks again, I'll be seeing you. Can't wait to get lost in this world again.


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